[He's aware those words are anything but what it feels like right now. Amazing. Neither of them are amazing right now. Blood runs through the dirt instead of flower roots, the scent of copper pervading the air rather than floral scents. Would the amazing have let this happen? Fuck no! Yet he has to say that, for both of their sakes. Gasping above the water, reminding them that they're not horrible people. Yuji's suggestion to build a garden for the lost is a tender idea, born from a desire to remember. Instead of death, memory by life that continues to grow. It's really amazing... to think like that even now.
Katsuki's hands slowly ease off the death grip on Yuji's shoulders, though it'd take severing his wrists to get him to let go of the other boy completely right now. As much as it hurts, as much as the frustration and pain of their failure continues to tear at his heart and flush through his skin each time he remembers it, Yuji's keeping him afloat. They don't have to go through this alone, something Katsuki's still learning and struggling with. Letting someone see him so weak and vulnerable is scary, embarrassing, but if it's Yuji... he can trust him with this weight.
There's no way to tell exactly when his best friend became so important to him, but he treasures it. Warmth seeps between that beating heart and his own, offering strength and a gentle hand to help him rise again. Hurting, but alive. He's not going to let Yuji fall, just as Yuji won't let him drop.
Of course he shakes his head. And returns the words at the same time. It's foolish, stupid, childish, and yet so important to hear someone else say it. Amazing. Once they get through this, they'll know they are. Again. He doesn't feel amazing. But deep down, they have to be. Otherwise, none of them would bother continuing to do this crazy shit. Heroes are pretty insane too, aren't they.]
Aa.
[He would. Every time. Katsuki slowly moves his head so he's not soaking Yuji's chest so much, the wracking sounds and shudders forcefully pulled to a stop before they're probably good to be reined in. Katsuki's trying to board himself up again, trying to get over it and be strong once more.]
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Katsuki's hands slowly ease off the death grip on Yuji's shoulders, though it'd take severing his wrists to get him to let go of the other boy completely right now. As much as it hurts, as much as the frustration and pain of their failure continues to tear at his heart and flush through his skin each time he remembers it, Yuji's keeping him afloat. They don't have to go through this alone, something Katsuki's still learning and struggling with. Letting someone see him so weak and vulnerable is scary, embarrassing, but if it's Yuji... he can trust him with this weight.
There's no way to tell exactly when his best friend became so important to him, but he treasures it. Warmth seeps between that beating heart and his own, offering strength and a gentle hand to help him rise again. Hurting, but alive. He's not going to let Yuji fall, just as Yuji won't let him drop.
Of course he shakes his head. And returns the words at the same time. It's foolish, stupid, childish, and yet so important to hear someone else say it. Amazing. Once they get through this, they'll know they are. Again. He doesn't feel amazing. But deep down, they have to be. Otherwise, none of them would bother continuing to do this crazy shit. Heroes are pretty insane too, aren't they.]
Aa.
[He would. Every time. Katsuki slowly moves his head so he's not soaking Yuji's chest so much, the wracking sounds and shudders forcefully pulled to a stop before they're probably good to be reined in. Katsuki's trying to board himself up again, trying to get over it and be strong once more.]
I'll help. [With the garden.]