[ She does shake her head immediately though at the suggestion to go to her other friends. She leans back against the wall and hugs the pillow back against her. It's a kind suggestion, but one she can't follow. ]
I... I don't want them to see me like this.
[ Would they be happy to help her? Yes, she's sure of it. But she doesn't want them to see her like that. Is it because she feels unworthy of that help, because she doesn't want to be a bother or because she wants her image to be preserved? A mixture of all three, perhaps.
She's shown that side of her too much lately. But that's not what she wants to be, a goddess who's never learned to control her emotions... An unhappy goddess so weak, she cannot resist a mere kaiju's spell. Though, the doctor has never learned why she is that way, has he? Maybe... Maybe... ]
... There was never anyone down there. Nobody to talk to. Nobody to befriend. To be comforted by... [Her eyes drift down, staring absently at the pillow.] The dead sleep... But their caretaker doesn't. N-Never, even when she wants to...
[ And she doesn't mean sleep in the literal sense - but sleep in the sense of death. Gods are born from human thoughts. What human could live imprisoned underground alone for eternity and be happy? None, of course. And so, no god born from humanity's thoughts and desires could be happy in such circumstances.
But even so, she must smile. For the souls who depend on her. ]
I need time... I-It is all so new to me. [She buries her head back into the pillow. She can feel the tears coming back, that means it's hiding.] I will go to them... B-But only when I'll be able to... [A pause.] ... smile.
cw: mentions of suicidal ideation
I... I don't want them to see me like this.
[ Would they be happy to help her? Yes, she's sure of it. But she doesn't want them to see her like that. Is it because she feels unworthy of that help, because she doesn't want to be a bother or because she wants her image to be preserved? A mixture of all three, perhaps.
She's shown that side of her too much lately. But that's not what she wants to be, a goddess who's never learned to control her emotions... An unhappy goddess so weak, she cannot resist a mere kaiju's spell. Though, the doctor has never learned why she is that way, has he? Maybe... Maybe... ]
... There was never anyone down there. Nobody to talk to. Nobody to befriend. To be comforted by... [Her eyes drift down, staring absently at the pillow.] The dead sleep... But their caretaker doesn't. N-Never, even when she wants to...
[ And she doesn't mean sleep in the literal sense - but sleep in the sense of death. Gods are born from human thoughts. What human could live imprisoned underground alone for eternity and be happy? None, of course. And so, no god born from humanity's thoughts and desires could be happy in such circumstances.
But even so, she must smile. For the souls who depend on her. ]
I need time... I-It is all so new to me. [She buries her head back into the pillow. She can feel the tears coming back, that means it's hiding.] I will go to them... B-But only when I'll be able to... [A pause.] ... smile.