November/December catch-all

[laidtocrest]

WHO: Sylvain and some people
WHAT: me living up to some promises; him having a bad time
WHERE: various and sundry places
WHEN: at various and sundry times, probably mostly after dark due to 90% of this game being vampires at this point
WARNINGS: stupid, will update with actual warnings

Comments

AND THE MAIN REASON I POSTED THIS, OPEN TO WHOMEVER before I do closed starters, A HOT MESS

[laidtocrest]

[So, there's a ditch. It's gently sloped, made of cement or concrete or some futuristic equivalent thereof - point being, it's not soft. Gently curved. There's leaves clogging the bottom of it, and the implication of branches, but closer investigation would reveal that it's actually a gaudy futuristic plastic tree that got thrown out.

Probably the casualty of some office's redecorating. It feels like the sort of bric-a-brac a person would find in the lobby of a dentist.

And there's other trash at the bottom of this gutter. Wrappers. A bag. And also a groaning Sylvain Gautier, who has a pounding headache and a mouth that tastes like hope died in it. Not having a good time. Absolutely vile. There's a bad smell, and it's not him (he doesn't smell good, don't misunderstand), and it's not from the ditch he's currently in, but it's from a secret third thing. From the distance, music is playing and the repetitive guitar riff doesn't really help matters - with the headache, the ambiance, with anything else.

But, here he is. In a gutter. Contemplating his life and his choices, and the aftertaste in his mouth, and maybe you're with him, side by side in the gutter. Or maybe you're approaching him. Or maybe you're doing the smart thing and walking away, pretending like you didn't see him, in which case this thread is either going to end really fast or you're about to get a plastic tree branch to the head, but-

But regardless. He gurgles out a sound. A-]

Hey.

[In theory it's a hey. In practice it might just be a gurgled noise.]

[intertwinedfates]

[Sure, there for a while Sylvain is all by his lonesome in said ditch, sans stink, but we won't count that because ugh who would? Then there's a loud roar of an engine and a shadow sailing overhead, followed by a high-pitched scream coming from a body dropping out of the sky as a hoverbike goes sailing across to the other side of the gutter, minus its rider.

Who just so happens to land precisely on the spot that one Sylvain is already occupying, not so much with a splat as a thud, or perhaps a whump from two soft bodies making contact with each other.

Said body groans plaintively while trying hard not to move too much just yet, since that landing really smarted. Although once Yato realizes that it wasn't ground that broke his fall but a fellow unfortunate, he twists around to see who else has had the displeasure of meeting such a fate.]

Ugh... You good down there?

[Stupid question, but it beats saying "hi" or "oops?"]

[sports anime voice] hayai

[laidtocrest]

[So, it's actually kind of peaceful for a while? In a strange sort of way. At one point, a couple walks past, and Sylvain lifts up his head ever so slightly to see if he wants to ask them for help and immediately decides against it - hard to explain, but his every instinct tells him that he'll be happier lying in this ditch rather than call out to them. And so he settles back into his ditch, closing his eyes. It's like he's a bodhisattva climbing the path of enlightenment. (Not that Sylvain knows what that is, but same vibes, same mood, same feel. You know? Sometimes, different cultures can converge on the same path.)

Then there's a noise, his eyes flutter open just in time for something hard to impact him with an oof and a groan and he might have hit his head from the impact, again, and the only thing keeping Sylvain from cursing or reacting more strongly is the fact that he's already a human mushroom log waiting for the inevitable weight of decay to take him, and now he just wants to decay harder.

He's asked a question.]

...

[The "..." was the sound of him trying to come up with a response and instead gurgling out something that defies the English language - no letters can capture the noise that burbled out of his mouth. Trying that again.]

No.

[...]

Got a knife tucked away somewhere if you wanna just put me outta my misery. You know. [He limply mimes a dramatic mercy kill with one hand. But, changing the subject:]

...you okay?

Sylvain is a treasure haha

[intertwinedfates]

[Sometimes you just gotta lay there in your ditch and contemplate life. You know, the earth, the stars, the sun... How it all converges to put you in the place you've ended up in a fit of bad luck. Or bad driving, as the case may be. Who decided that vehicles should be allowed to people without any proper training or licensing? Whoever they are, they should be put in a smelly ditch for a while to see how they like it.

Instead, Sylvain gets Yato, who is currently a Calamity in more ways than was intended as he hits the mushroom meat log that is the redhead. It might not be decay waiting for him, but instead a scrawny twunk of a god whose buttocks connects squarely with his stomach. They can both thank their not-so-lucky stars that the hoverbike Yato had been riding doesn't end up sliding back down to greet them, lodging itself in a bush on the opposite bank.

That only leaves the small matter of introductions. And apologies. That would be good, too.]

Huh?

[Gurgle louder, please, he didn't quite catch that.]

Ah. Right. ["Whoopsie" almost escapes his lips, but he manages to groan out a quiet "shit" instead. Not exactly polite, but definitely more fitting given the circumstances.]

...got a sword. Will that do? We could commit seppuku. [He sighs, flexing all his limbs to check that he is indeed alright before rolling to the side off his impromptu landing pad.] Yeah, think so. Didn't break anything, didja?

[laidtocrest]

Nothing that wasn't already broken.

[He, slowly, with another gurgle, rolls in the opposite direction of Yato and does so very gingerly and slowly and prepared to hold out a hand to stop Yato if need be: he's gotta see if his stomach will hold or not, and the less hair holding needed the better for everyone involved.]

How'd you end up here?

[Yes, he's making small talk while doing this, but you know what? No reason to not be social. He breathes in, and out again, and okay. Okay, stomach shows signs of holding. Okay, he can roll, this is an improvement, in theory he can roll his way to a bathroom and rot in there instead. Progress. This is what he gets for eating when he's a vampire. This is what happens. A guy forgets and now look at him.]

[intertwinedfates]

That's... good?

[Sorta?? Meaning that anything broken isn't good, but better than having more busted? Thankfully Yato's made of tough stuff and manages to heave himself upright without too much moaning and groaning. Just enough to let the world know it's a bastard and he aches something fierce.]

Me and my new hoverbike took that turn a little too quickly. How 'bout you? Lookin' for a little solitude or just enjoying the ambiance?

[He casts a glance behind him toward Sylvain with a wry smile, knowing full well that neither option is likely to be the real reason. But hey, gotta start a conversation somewhere, and implying your gutter buddy is a stumbling lush isn't the way to go.]

[laidtocrest]

[He rasps put a laugh, and immediately regrets it because ow, his head. His head. Still, Sylvain half-turns to look at Yato and grins. It's the smile someone flashes when they know what someone else is probably actually thinking and don't mind.]

Ate something I shouldn't. And I knew I shouldn't but I couldn't say no.

I know, I know, it's not that exciting.

[intertwinedfates]

[Hopefully Sylvain's marbles didn't get too rattled when Yato landed on him. That's make him feel bad and a touch guilty. For now though, he peers curiously at the redhead, then up the bank, then back down to him.]

Not exciting, perhaps, but still curious. Were you leaning over to be sick in and fell in, or...?

[He's trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together while wondering if maybe he ought to hurriedly move out of the way in case Sylvain needs to upchuck. No offense, bro, but that'd be a bit much for a first meeting.]

[laidtocrest]

[None would be taken.]

Nah, the last thing I remember was staggering down the alley over there-

[He gestures, the alley over there, the one with the slightly weird odor they're not going to explore, because all alleys have weird odors.]

And then I ended up here, passed out, woke up and then you came along. [Change of subject, as Sylvain tries to get up and groans, this is such a bad idea but he can't just be a ditch redhead, no, he's not a mushroom log - he is a man, and should go die in a bathroom instead of in a ditch.]

What's the worst night you ever had?

[intertwinedfates]

[He nods, regretting the gesture immediately and letting out a faint groan. His head's still spinning slightly, or maybe it's the world that's going around. Either way, he plants both hands on either side of his head to help it stop.]

Glad you didn't take a tumble, at least. It sucks majorly. Would not recommend. Ugh...

[Once everything seems to be wobbling less, he makes another valiant attempt at speaking, hands dragging down the sides of his face.]

Worst night? Lesse... musta been after a steady week of fighting, having my partner quit on me and my sister ditch me to go back to Dad, leaving me with no weapon and no money after I drank it all and made myself sick from getting into a bar fight. Wars suck, man.

[Ignoring his own problems for a moment, he grabs Sylvain by the back of the shirt and tries to help heft him into an upright position, grunting as he does so. It's the least he can do right now for landing on him, honestly.]

[laidtocrest]

Wa-

[He was saying that a little too loudly and a little too quickly, and as Yato grabs the back of his shirt Sylvain decides that now isn't the time for talk, no, now is the time for quietly getting upright as best as he can. Otherwise, things might become disgusting and this thread would have to have a quick scene change or have 500 euphemisms slammed over the top of it.

And why beat around the bush when there's something more interesting? So: he gets upright. Sylvain closes his eyes for a second and wills the world to stop moving (he misses food, he misses ice cream, he liked the taste of tacos, he wants to try more) before he opens them again.

And then Sylvain looks at Yato.]

Wars do suck. Something like that happened to me once, except I was the one who ditched, and it was my father telling me to go patrol a border for a few weeks.

worm worm worm

[laidtocrest]

[This is probably going to be a really shitty week of worm-themed shenanigans, but, day (well, night) two: Sylvain still has a little bit of hope left within his soul. A few shreds of hope still clinging to him despite all of his best attempts at getting rid of it.

So, night two. They're disguised. They're gathering information. There's a guy blocking their way in the alley. He's tripping balls, gently swaying back and forth in what breeze there is, holding what suspiciously looks like a bit of worm in his fist. He's experiencing everything and nothing all at once, arms gently raising; Hunter and Sylvain are experiencing a guy in their way.]

Hey. [Nudge.] Why don't you try dancing with him? Maybe he'll get out of the way.

[newphew]

[ hunter is as tired-looking and beaten up as usual, grumpily accompanying sylvain and somewhat regretting his life decisions ]

[ and there's some guy absolutely losing his mind with a something clutched in his fist. hunter looks down at this man, nudges him gently with a foot, and then.... sylvain talks ]

[ hunter gives him a sour look ]

You're not funny.

[ no jokes allowed!!! illegal!! ] Open his hand.

[ hunter apparently decided he's going to call the shots ]

[laidtocrest]

[He looks at Hunter.]

That's adorable.

[And he's going to go along with it because Hunter's all grown up and trying to call the shots now, which might be worse than just fighting it in certain important respects, huh? Sylvain's heading over to the guy and...]

Hey there, buddy, mind if I take a look?

[The guy says something that's straight up speaking in tongues, some "⬥︎♒︎♋︎⧫︎ ♎︎♓︎♎︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎ ⬧︎♋︎⍓︎✍︎" level gibberish.]

You catch that? [This is to Hunter, whilst he just gently takes the man by the hand and gently try to pry his fingers open...the fist tightens.]

worm worm worm worm [worm chants intensify]

[laidtocrest]

[But regardless, Vash probably could use a distraction so here they are, in Vegas. Chasing down bits of worm.

But Sylvain still has hope, mainly because somebody has to. They're going in circles, and he knows it, and he knows that Vash knows it, and-]

Look, this is the third time we saw that same casino and- [No, something more important to focus on.] -is that kaiju porn?

[Because it sure does look like a kaiju porn movie theater right over there.]

this is the worst thank you

[photosympathies]

( He had thought accompanying Sylvain on his worm-mission would have been enough to drag him from the depths of his Wolfwood shaped depression. He had thought he'd have been able to focus on something more useful, more productive. He had hoped anyway. Except the longer they walked, the more his thoughts wandered. Las Vegas was a bright city - much like July - and he had a whole host of bad experiences with those, so really the struggle was coming from inside the house.

Until Sylvain speaks.

Vash's head lifts, swivelling to what his friend is looking at before he can stop himself. For a moment there is no reaction. And then his eyes widen behind the orange of his glasses and his face spasms and his voice goes all squeaky. ) What? No, wait - what?

( There's a poster. He looks at it. )

Why?

you're welcome this is an intervention LESS SADSACK

[laidtocrest]

[And this is the first big reaction he's gotten out of Vash, and, so, Sylvain brightens and slings a nice arm around his shoulder even as he is quickly deciding what he feels about this. To be decided, but it's nice knowing that even a slut like himself might discover there's new kinks out there. The world is a big place. Full of mysteries!]

No clue! But if we're finding this here you know there's gotta be a big demand for it. Rent's not cheap.

[That said, he's neither stepping closer nor retreating. They can just admire it from here.]

Place looks pretty new. [Like it was remodeled shortly after the Vegas mission - not that Sylvain had been around for that, but still.]

WOW via pornography???

[photosympathies]

Okay, but why is there a normal human woman? Surely the - the size difference ... why would they -? ( He trails off a little, lifting a hand to scrub at his eye, baffled. And it's not entirely that Vash is a prude. He's been around a long time, okay! He enjoys figuring things out, he's heard stories, he's hung out with guys who own dirty magazines! He's even - once or twice - had sex. But this? ) Also ... aren't people usually like, afraid of the kaiju?

( HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND. )

Why is it even wearing a shirt in the first place? Just to rip it?

yeah!!!

[laidtocrest]

[Sylvain's working backwards even as he's dragging Vash towards the poster in question. They can walk together.]

Shirt's probably 'cause it's fun undressing your partner. Helps with the anticipation. And sometimes, fear's sexy? There's a reason why sex and horror go hand in hand.

[But he's going to carry on before Vash asks too many questions because he's an idiot with two brain cells that can barely spark an idea if you knock them together, and he doesn't want Vash questioning it.]

And maybe it's...uh. I don't know. Ribbed for her pleasure? And, judging from the art, she's into it.

[photosympathies]

What does that even mean?

( Except the question is small and under his breath. Because unfortunately for Sylvain ( and possibly for Mr. The Stampede ) those one or two times were never very informative. It is hard to have interpersonal relationships when you spend a century on the run. Even harder when your evil twin brother kills anyone you ever touch out of spite fuelled jealousy. Sometimes it has been far easier to just pretend he's not interested in all that. Any of the titty-mags he'd accidentally seen were normal anyway. )

Fear's sexy?

( More out loud this time. More firm a curiosity. )

[laidtocrest]

[It's amended to,]

Fear can be sexy. Not all the time, but there's a reason why a lot of people find quiet corners after a battle and- [In for a gold, in for a bullion.] Well, fuck it out.

[Sylvain's just going to lead Vash a little ways away from the Sexy Kaiju poster, because even if he's going to have this conversation, gosh darn it, he's not going to have it right next to a Sexy Kaiju. The Sexy Kaiju can watch them (with a smoldering gaze) as they retreat a few steps away.

Because yes, he's still companionably draped over Vash's shoulders. Better to wrangle him around instead of letting him be a free range sadsack.]

You read a lot, Vash? Or if not read, do whatever it is people from your home do for fun when it comes to swapping stories.

[photosympathies]

( At fuck it out Vash physically chokes on his own exhale, the sound coming from him after a little rattling wheeze. ) No they don't! ( And then, with dawning realisation ( and maybe a smidgen of horror ). ) Oh, they do.

( Listen, he's been around. He's seen what people get up to. He's rolled with a few gangs in his time and sometimes he's witnessed people wandering off after a gunfight. He just never gave it too much thought. Sylvain might be realigning some things.

Either way he's just letting himself be directed because the physical weight of the other man's arm is soothing and he could use some friendly camaraderie right about now. ) I read, yeah. I mean, whenever I can. Why?

[laidtocrest]

[And Sylvain could use someone to be friendly camaradering at because why not, and also because Dimitri has banned him from hugs 2 months in a row and sometimes a man needs to friendly lean against someone. So it all works out, or something.]

Just figuring out where I need to start. What sorts of things do you read, Vash? Me, I- [This is the point in which he'd swerve in some way, but he's in for a bullion.] Usually go for histories when I've got a choice - I know, I don't look the type or act the type, and it's not like it's any use here.

[photosympathies]

I'll read anything.

( But history and horses for his new redheaded friend? Sure. Makes sense. ) Like, literally anything. People have such a big imagination, and I like seeing where it goes. Back on No Man's Land I liked these cheap mysteries. Sometimes you could get one in a gas station for a coupla double-dollars. Sometimes the romances too. ( A beat and then. ) N-not like the posters! But the sweet ones. With the happy endings.

( That Vash the Stampede likes happily ever afters is probably not so surprising. He's been chasing after one for everyone as long as he's been alive. )

I like physical books better than using the implant though. So I've been reading with some of the kids. I think if you like to read histories you should keep doing that. They shouldn't get to take that from you.

[laidtocrest]

[Happy endings says Vash, and Sylvain huffs, amused, but...maybe not in a bad way. It's not a malicious huff, just more like - of course he would, of course he wants happy endings, Sylvain's known Vash for all of maybe a handful of weeks but he already knows that much about the blond. It's obvious.

And he smiles at Vash, as Vash tells him that he shouldn't let them take that away from him. It's not like Sylvain doesn't smile - he's just all easy smiles and easier grins, but this time it's something smaller.]

Maybe I will. [Then, louder, more like his usual self:] But sounds like you don't read too much horror- don't worry, I don't either. But you know what horror and porn have in common?