WHO: Malkuth & Others
WHAT: Various threads for April (hmu for starters if needed!!!)
WHERE: Pretty much anywhere
WHEN: Anytime during April
WARNINGS: probable violence, drinking, cannibalism, sex, spoilers for Lobotomy Corporation & Library of Ruina will be marked as needed
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[ There's silence as he listens, as they dance, as the band moves on from his request to resume their set. ]
You appear undaunted, to me. It's admirable. The grass is always greener on the other side, y'know?
My life is full of regrets. And yet I'm cursed to the cycle. To walk circles, repeat mistakes. So I'll get this off my chest now, the only time I can be brave and direct and honest.
And maybe I can dream that next time I won't have to hide behind the alcohol.
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... It's hard to escape. But it's not impossible.
[ to leave a cycle. to break it. it's easier just to live with it, to suffer and self-prophecize. malkuth shakes off his grip to reach up and clap her hands on his cheeks, squeezing them lightly. ]
I think... I'd like to hear this when I'm sober, too. There's nothing for you to be scared of.
[ because she does like him too. he's a close friend of hers, he makes her smile easier than most others, and... ]
You're one of the people I feel less lonely around. You don't let me feel lonely, and I like that. So you shouldn't be scared. Just... whenever.
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[ Kaito lifts his hands to cup over hers, tilting his head so he can nuzzle into one of her palms. Ugh. He hates that it's so much easier to just melt into her like this. No he doesn't. Rather, he hates that she won't remember this, even though it's what he was banking on in the first place.
Contradictions. Pots and kettles. Hypocrisy from Yomi to the City.
Her follow-up comes at the tail end of another song, and Kaito carefully slows to a halt so he can scoot in and hold her a little closer, again.
You're one of the people I feel less lonely around.
He's pretty sure he feels his heart skipping beats every other second. Stupid. Idiot. Stupid, lovable, beautiful idiot. He can't help but move his hands to her cheeks so he can zip in close (but not too close. No forehead touching, yet). ]
One day, I'll be brave enough to tell you everything. That you're important to me. That I almost feel like I belong when I'm with you.
...That if I were to ever lose you, I'd march back into hell and stay there this time, just so you could return and reclaim the happiness life owes you.
[ Between declarations, he's screwed his eyes shut and leaned forward to the point their foreheads did start touching. Kaito holds her there for just a second longer before drawing back to that comfortable distance. He's smiling, bright as the sun all over again, if not a bit misty eyed. ]
Someday I'll tell you how happy you make me, and you won't be allowed to forget.
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[ is what she whispers, the burn of his forehead against hers a brand that remains, unseen but felt. her heart twists and throws itself against the bone of her chest. it stays there, bruised through every lifetime, and she drops her hands from him to rub at her face.
she's not crying. but she does feel like she wants to, a little. in frustration more than anything. the other patrons are gonna side-eye him if she does get choked up, so she's doing her best to keep her voice level, even if it ends up soft. ]
At least... tell me that I'm important to you. If nothing else, that. Can't you? Or show it? I don't... want to be overlooked again.
[ he's so, so unfair. mean and a jerk. an idiot and unfair. how many times can she think that word until it loses meaning. ]
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[ Whispered in turn. He smiles, but his heart wrenches and wrings the same way hers does—and not just because he feels what she feels. His next move might be a little too risky to try on the dance floor, so first he picks up one of her hands. A bit of soft guiding brings Malkuth's palm to splay over her heart before he lays his hand over hers again.
Those rough fingertips of his just barely graze over the skin her dress exposes. He seeks her gaze and holds it. ]
Maybe that desperate hug wasn't enough. Or maybe it was the catalyst.
I'll make sure that in no uncertain terms, you'll know just how special you are. You deserve that. You're...
[ 'You're the most important person I have here in his godawful world.' ]
...You're too cute, even when you look like you're about to cry.
[ Yeah, even her inebriated state isn't enough assurance for him to say that. A meaninglessly mean jerk glint illuminates his golds. ]
Okay. No more unfair confessions. I don't want to make you any sadder. Dance with me, and let's forget together.
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it isn't like then. but she's still reminded of it anyway, even if his gaze won't leave her like that one always did. it's the same sort of gentle heartache that chews at her cheery mood. elijah always smiled anyway. malkuth tries to, too. ]
... Fine. But you owe me one. Jerk.
[ owe her something or other. unlike the waltz, she steps closer to wrap her arms around him and plop her head against his chest instead, not wanting to see her past in her present. not much of a dance position, but it's one she adopts anyway. ]
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Kaito adjusts so he can more or less do the lion's share of maneuvering them around the dance floor while she fwumps against his chest. One hand resumes its post at her back, but the other finds its way to her head, brushing and combing gently at the loosened strands while trying not to unravel that braid bun he'd worked so hard to create. ]
I don't forget my debts. But you'll have to forgive me if I eventually start spoiling the heck out of you without explaining why. Heheh.
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at least it's comforting having her hair played with. she liked the way march's hands felt too that first night, and the struggle between them for today... it eases her little by little, though she won't be rid entirely of it until she sleeps off the alcohol.
a sigh. ]
I usually do. [ just so he knows. ] And I'll try. But no promises on the forgiving thing.
[ she might be too baffled to understand why, after all. or she'll remember the way someone does parts of a dream, hazy yet clear. who knows what'll happen then. ]
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Forgiving is optional. I just want to keep making you smile.
—For better reasons than this current beam. [ Chuckling. Hand lifts from her back to poke her cheek. ]
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[ so no worries there, mumbled with a real smile but sincere nonetheless. she'd meant it when she said that he always makes her smile during their hanami picnic. kaito won't ever fail in that regard, and malkuth sighs as she relaxes more against him. ]
I don't think I can hold onto you for the way back, by the way. [ like she really expected she'd be able to........ ] If you let me fall face first off your bike, I'll let Snow White's Apple consume you.
[ no hesitation... she'll let that thing drain his nutrients as much as it pleased, since it hates being left out of happy endings. ]
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[ His hand shifts, cradling the brunette's head while keeping her nice and close. Just another moment he wants to stretch out to infinity. ]
As funny as you're making the idea sound, there's no way in hell I'm gonna let that happen. Don't worry—we're getting you home safe and sound.
[ Please. Please do not let the apple succ. ]