![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
[closed]
WHO: Denji and Makima for sure, maybe other combinations of chainsaw cast?
WHAT:A birthday party and the aftermath
WHERE: Cafeteria and Makima’s room
WHEN: Somewhere in the middle of September
WARNINGS: Makima unfortunately. Also Part 1 spoilers. Will add more specific issues as they come up.
[To say that, for the most part, it’s been a rough couple of months is probably an understatement. And despite her usual unflappable demeanor, there’s been some things grating on Makima too. But she’s thought of a great way to deal with that, and that’s why she’ll be spending a little bit of time in the cafeteria setting up a birthday surprise. Nothing terribly exciting, she’s not going all out for this, no there’s a budget to keep in mind, so it’s just a simple cake in the cafeteria with a card congratulating the guest of honor on their special day.
But that’s enough. She knows it’s enough. A little bit of a smile on her face as she sets it on one of the tables and sends off a couple of messages to the relevant attendees. Just a quick message asking them to come to the cafeteria. It’s very small guest list, but that’s fine, after all, even she won’t be attending the festivities.
No, that’s a bit too public of a setting for the afterparty, if there’ll be such a thing. So she’ll wait in her room for the time being. It won’t take anyone looking for her too long to find her, though if they want to, well that’s another story entirely.]
WHAT:A birthday party and the aftermath
WHERE: Cafeteria and Makima’s room
WHEN: Somewhere in the middle of September
WARNINGS: Makima unfortunately. Also Part 1 spoilers. Will add more specific issues as they come up.
[To say that, for the most part, it’s been a rough couple of months is probably an understatement. And despite her usual unflappable demeanor, there’s been some things grating on Makima too. But she’s thought of a great way to deal with that, and that’s why she’ll be spending a little bit of time in the cafeteria setting up a birthday surprise. Nothing terribly exciting, she’s not going all out for this, no there’s a budget to keep in mind, so it’s just a simple cake in the cafeteria with a card congratulating the guest of honor on their special day.
But that’s enough. She knows it’s enough. A little bit of a smile on her face as she sets it on one of the tables and sends off a couple of messages to the relevant attendees. Just a quick message asking them to come to the cafeteria. It’s very small guest list, but that’s fine, after all, even she won’t be attending the festivities.
No, that’s a bit too public of a setting for the afterparty, if there’ll be such a thing. So she’ll wait in her room for the time being. It won’t take anyone looking for her too long to find her, though if they want to, well that’s another story entirely.]
》aki
what he did not expect was— this.
as soon as he entered the cafeteria his gaze settled on the cake, positioned perfectly in the center of an empty dining table and his heart sank to his stomach almost instantly. time slowed down, distant voices began to muffle and all he could hear was his own rapid heartbeat. he then glanced up at the festive decore; there was something about the empty open space of the cafeteria that made the scenery even more daunting— more lonely. he froze in his spot, just like that day. he didn't say anything, just like that day.
how long was he standing there before aki stepped in is ... unknown. ]
no subject
[ Aki is feeling painfully on edge. This month is a deadly one, a dangerous one, and he's been particularly tight-lipped about his poor attitude and feelings over the last week; he's not mentioned a word to Tsurumaru, though he probably should have. His priority right now is to make sure that Denji is alright, and ignore the burning in his stomach that betrays what's at the forefront of his mind.
He died. He died, and Denji had to - after he went to see Makima - if he goes home, he's going to -
Walking over, without hesitation, Aki reaches out to take the other man's hand, squeezing his fingers and trying to keep himself together. He has to be strong this time. ]
You don't have to stay.
[ He knows.
He understands. ]
no subject
then why did it still fucking hurt? hurt this bad. far worse than before. it's like an open wound that never stopped bleeding.
he's quiet for a bit, still staring ahead— staring at no one but the empty space. the decorations were supposed to be in vivid, obnoxious colors, yet under the flickering lights of their kitchen they were dull and gloomy. 'happy birthday' it says. the cake is big enough to feed many people, yet she left behind a single chair; neatly positioned. ]
I'm really ... all alone, huh.
[ no. he's not talking about his life in this city, and aki will be able to tell. this is simply a harsh reminder that someone like him didn't deserve a normal, happy life. ]
no subject
Right now, though... Denji needs him more than anything else, and he moves to stand between the other man and the view of the cake, trying to block it out. ]
You're aren't right now.
[ It's a hollow thing, the joy they've found here, knowing that at any moment they could be pulled away from one another again. That Denji would be alone and Aki would be dead and none of this would matter, because they likely won't remember it. But this is all he can offer Denji right now, even if it isn't enough. ]
I'm here with you, Denji. Focus on that. Not what she wants to do to you.
no subject
however, unfortunately — denji was out of it.
he glanced upward, meeting the other's gaze, looking terribly pathetic for falling into her games again. that easy. like nothing had changed. he wished he could shake it off, pretend he would get over it, but—
he's quiet for a bit, keeping it together so far. barely. denji then takes in a breath before he asks. ]
.... can you please take it down? I don't want anyone else to see this ... [ the cake and decorations. ]
no subject
You don't need to ask me twice.
[ Leaning in, he touches Denji's cheek gently, thumb on his cheekbone, before he nods and steps around him, deliberately turning the other man around so that he's not looking. It's too easy to move around, then, getting rid of the decorations, to lift the cake and take it away and shove it in the kitchen. He even scrapes the icing off; there's no need to waste food, but he doesn't want to highlight the birthday either.
This is a difficult month for them both. It will continue to be difficult, because after September... November isn't too far away. Aki doesn't know how he'll cope then, either.
Coming back to Denji's side, he reaches out to offer his hand. ]
Do you want to go back to your room?
no subject
by the time his old friend returned to his side, he had enough time to think of his options here. they can't change how they feel, the damage is already been done. with a hazy mind, he nods. yes, he wanted to leave — not sure his room was the best option, but he wouldn't burden aki more. he's quiet during their walk back, and as they reach the room, denji gives the impression this is how their night will end; in silence and defeat. and while that idea is tempting as fuck, because he's tired, he pulls himself together to say something.
- something new. something different.
with one hand on the grip of his bedroom door, he turns to face aki; nothing about his face says he's okay, way too pale and sickish, but his voice is oddly steady. ]
I don't think ... I ever thanked you. For loving Power and I.
[ they already expressed regret, guilt and remorse— but, never this. in such a hellish night, denji figured it was either now or never. ]
I don't think we understood what love is, as cheesy as that might sound, we really didn't. Now I know it was in the way you took us in, the way you made sure there was food on the table, clean clothes on our beds, and teaching us to be less shitty creatures. You didn't need to do any of that. You genuinely loved us.
I guess what I want you to know is ... we loved you, too.
no subject
Perhaps there is merit in those other surgeries that LILITH offers.
Pausing by the door, expecting to follow the other man inside, Aki almost walks into him when Denji stops and begins to speak, and it whiplashes his heart with a thousand thorns, but a kind of pain that feels good rather than sour and aching.
How is he meant to not comfort him, hold him, after a moment like this?
Tears in his own eyes, Aki reaches out, wrapping his arms around Denji and holding him, tender and warm and as careful as he can be, as if one squeeze too much might break them both. ]
You don't need to thank me for it.
[ Pressing his face into Denji, he breathes out, almost a sniffle. ]
Before I met you both, all I wanted was revenge and death. I sold everything I had to get it, because I would be able to die freely once the Gun Devil was dealt with, and everyone knew it. It's why I took the Curse Devil, why I took the Future Devil when it was offered. Nothing else mattered to me, until...
[ Until Denji. Until Power. Aki shakes a little with the weight of his own emotion. ]
I hadn't felt happiness since I was a child, but then I met you and her. You reminded me what it felt like to care about someone, to want to see them smile, to share their joy and sadness both. Everything I did, everything I chose to do, was because I wanted your happiness more than anything else in the world.
[ More than his own. More than his life. ]
You are important to me, Denji. I love you, and I love Power, and that will never change.
》makima
eventually, he finds himself standing in front of makima's door. should he knock, or - bust it open? it's tempting. ]
no subject
[A call from behind the door. Because she knows he’s there, of course she does. Even without smelling him, she knew he’d be by sooner or later. There’s no way he wouldn’t. Not after that.]
It isn’t locked.
[Her voice even, controlled. The perfect contrast to sending him reeling and she knows she did. There’s a smirk hidden behind that door, she wonders if he can tell.]
no subject
instead, denji stood by the door's frame— taking in every ominous detail of her room, perfectly structured to emulate her apartment back home. every single inch of it. he felt sick; skin growing pale, heart beating so hard in his chest. he's feverish a bit when he finally catches her eyes. ]
Why did you invite Aki?
no subject
[That little grin still on her face, her eyes looking at him curiously. Not doing too well it seems, but she’s hardly surprised by that. No, the real surprise would’ve been if he’d taken her little birthday gift in stride.]
I’ll admit I’m a little unfamiliar with these things, but aren’t you supposed to celebrate your birthday with family? Especially now that you have the chance to.
[No need for her to explain why, of course.]
no subject
denji struggles with his words. he's not smart enough to bite back with a clever comeback. he's not that type and it pissed him off. then again, is he in the mood to chitchat? no. behind all the anxieties there is anger, and it's comforting. it's less painful and more sedating. ]
The deal is off ...
[ it's a question, not a statement, almost as if he wanted makima to make that judgment. if that's her way of tossing it out of the window, they had no reason to 'talk' anymore. ]
no subject
[Some faux-concern here, Makima leaning over a little to regard him carefully. It’s likely not an unfamiliar gesture, though she’s keeping some distance. Not out of self-preservation here, she’s just giving him some space to suffer, basically. If she steps too close, she knows the situation will change, and she doesn’t want that yet.]
Are you saying it’s my choice? That’s interesting...here, I thought you didn’t even want me saying the word, so the idea of giving me control over when it ends…
[She lets that thought hang for a moment, she doesn’t say what she thinks about that idea, keeping those thoughts hidden. Like she said, it’s interesting. Watching him teeter off balance like this, how easy it was to send him reeling. She’s been out of his life back home, but it’s clear he isn’t too far removed from her, not at all. She had some inkling of it before, obviously, but this is a far more complete picture of damage still inflicted than she’d had before.]
Is that what you want Denji? For me to make the decision for you? Is it easier that way? If you don’t have to think about it?
no subject
... inferior?
with all those anxieties, denji is also restless. it was hard to think about their situation, their limitation in this city, and the consequences of jumping into this without serious consideration. even with the haze in his mind, he understood he didn't want to die. for once, he truly didn't want to fucking die. if they were back home, he'd say fuck it and swing it, but here? he had to make sure first. ]
Yeah. Decide.
[ tell him: to either stay put or bite back. it's in makima's hands. ]
I need to know if the deal is off or not.
no subject
And she’s not giving that right away, her lips curling into a smile. It’s not quite what she wants, no, but it’s close. The only question is does she settle for close enough? This has been a world of compromise, so there’s been quite a lot she’s settled or made do with, but this?]
If that’s what you want, fine. I’ll make the decision.
[Still smiling here, she’s enjoying it being her choice to make. She’s not sure if he’ll agree, especially when she gives her answer, but it’s too late, that’s been ceded to her. Of course, he could always choose to make his own choice, but he doesn’t seem to be in much of a state to. Not in her opinion, anyways.]
But not today.
[To her, it’s the most unpleasant choice she can make. There’s not the resumption of outright hostilities, sure to be messy and violent, and put the recent property destruction in the other dorm to shame. But there’s also not the continuation of things as they were pre-cake. She knows that’s created an irrevocable change in their status quo, so keeping things as they were simply weren’t an option. Instead there’s...this. No decision, no conclusion, not out of indecisiveness, but in a very purposeful manner.]
And for what it's worth, I think Aki would prefer me not making the decision today as well.
》makima
Hovering outside her door, he feels a sense of dread overcome him. It's completely different from when he went to the Future Devil, prepared to sign himself over to defeat the Gun. Now, he has something to risk, something to lose - that tangible, painfully given happiness, that could be ripped from him at any moment.
Lifting his hand, he knocks on the frame of the door, frowning. ]
Makima-san.
no subject
Hayakawa-kun, please come in.
[She says as if nothing's out of the ordinary, welcoming him into her room. The interior thanks to the hologram is a mirror of her place back home. Not that he saw it, but that's not terribly important to her, the appearance of her room isn't for him anyways.]
I'd rather you did anyways, it can be a little difficult to hold a conversation in the hall sometimes.
[An apologetic look there, once again acting like nothing out of the ordinary has occurred. Her expression has nothing to do with what she's done, it's more she'd prefer he not get caught in the crossfire of whatever Brimstone drama is happening in the hall today.
...it's her for once, she's the cause of the drama, but at least hers is mostly quiet.]
no subject
I've been careful to be polite with you, Makima-san, since I arrived here, despite what happens in our own world.
[ His death. His misuse, at her hands, all because he wanted to save Denji and Power, protect them and their happiness. He might not have lived it yet, but seeing how Denji responded to it had been enough. The heartbreak, the angst, the hurt of it all... That had broken a part of him. ]
What you did today was unnecessary, and cruel, and I don't want to see it happen again. Denji doesn't deserve this.
no subject
I disagree that it was unnecessary.
[She thinks it was very much the opposite, but that it was cruel? She doesn’t dispute that.]
But I appreciate you bringing your concerns to me.
[Very much sounding managerial here or like Aki's call will be answered in the order it was received. And no comment on whether Denji deserves it or not.]
no subject
[ Aki doesn't care how she looks at him. Either way, he's going to die here - either he'll be sent home or his payments to the Curse Devil will catch up with him. His life has less meaning right now, especially compared with Denji's.
There's no real way that he can threaten Makima either, but... He has to do something. ]
It's not a concern, Makima-san. You're not actually my superior here, and I'm dead in our world, so either way, this isn't me raising a concern with my boss. This is me telling you that you should leave Denji alone.
[ He's tense, his grip tight, nails digging into his hand. It's not quite fear, but it's something very much like it. ]
He's been through enough.
no subject
[There’s a pointed look here, some weight behind her words. She’s still polite, she isn’t raising her voice at him, she’s not arguing. But there’s still some authority in her tone, even if she isn’t his boss anymore. And even if her words don’t carry the effect they would back home.]
And as I said, your concerns are noted. But they’re not going to change anything. What’s done is done, and it’s far too late to make a request like that.
[It’s not even due to the birthday surprise, she was never going to leave Denji alone. But she doesn’t think that’s entirely one-sided, even if the malice is entirely on her end. There have been times where he’s sought her out, those awkward uncomfortable conversations. Not quite the same, but in Makima’s mind it counts as not leaving her alone either.]
And for what it’s worth, even though I’m not your boss anymore, I commend your efforts, Hayakawa-kun. It can’t have been easy coming here, I know it didn’t slip your mind when talking to me, whatever you’d remembered, whatever Denji had told you. But you’ve never spoken to me as I am.
[Her smile’s a little melancholy looking but also a little cruel. Her stare entirely on him, she noticed that tenseness, but her eye contact doesn’t waver in the slightest.]
That said, this is rather futile. I doubt there’s any way we can leave each other alone now. If there ever was.
[She’s skeptical that some sort of breaking point wouldn’t have naturally occurred anyways. The way Makima sees things she just exercised some control over the what and when.]
no subject
Lifting his head, he grits his teeth. He is afraid, he is frightened, he is worried about the outcome of this conversation, but his love for Denji outweighs his fear for his own life.
He's going to die. That makes him reckless - it always has made him reckless. There's a reason why his peers had always considered Aki one of the more insane members of Public Safety. ]
Then you need to try. It's not a request. Whatever reasoning you have, whatever purpose you have for trying to hurt him time and time again, I refuse to accept it. Denji is too important to have to suffer your plans.
[ His metal hand's grip is tight, the slide of the material against itself almost grating. ]
I can't force you, we both know that. You've already killed me once. [ It's futile, isn't it? What can he actually do?
Powerless. Pathetic. He barely even has a contract here, and while he might be able to explode them both with his rocket launcher, it's almost inevitable that she'd survive.
What a waste. ]
But it is something you should think about, in the long term.
[ Aki might not be able to do anything to hurt her, but he could try and rally others. He doesn't like the idea, and he doubts he'd actually go through with it beyond crying about it to Tsurumaru, but the threat is there all the same. ]
no subject
I very much consider the long term, and if you’re going to impede me, then the logical solution would be to remove you.
[Matter of factly, though it’s not framed as a threat. Or not any more of a threat than Makima talking about removing someone already is.]
However, I don’t see a need to do that. As I’ve said before, you’re a hard worker. I’d be doing not only LILITH a disservice, but myself if I did that.
[Just doesn’t seem worth it if you ask her. That's not even accounting for what she's sure would be some kind of punishment for such things.]
And much as you seem to be imploring me to not do anything that would be...let's say unwise, I would stress the same.
no subject
Aki had tried, and he had failed. There is nothing he can do to protect Denji, utterly powerless to stand up to Makima and take care of the person who means the most to him in the world. The worst part of it, he thinks, is the fact that she can see it, that she reads through him as if he's transparent, burning inside of him and making him feel sour and bitter.
Bowing his head, he breathes out. He needs a cigarette. ]
I understand.
[ There's an underlying threat in her words, too. If he impedes her too much... His life is more forfeit than it already is. ]
Have a good day, Makima-san.
no subject
[She says, knowing full well he is not and likely will not have a good day today.]