[closed]

[kubricks]

WHO: Denji and Makima for sure, maybe other combinations of chainsaw cast?
WHAT:A birthday party and the aftermath
WHERE: Cafeteria and Makima’s room
WHEN: Somewhere in the middle of September
WARNINGS: Makima unfortunately. Also Part 1 spoilers. Will add more specific issues as they come up.


[To say that, for the most part, it’s been a rough couple of months is probably an understatement. And despite her usual unflappable demeanor, there’s been some things grating on Makima too. But she’s thought of a great way to deal with that, and that’s why she’ll be spending a little bit of time in the cafeteria setting up a birthday surprise. Nothing terribly exciting, she’s not going all out for this, no there’s a budget to keep in mind, so it’s just a simple cake in the cafeteria with a card congratulating the guest of honor on their special day.

But that’s enough. She knows it’s enough. A little bit of a smile on her face as she sets it on one of the tables and sends off a couple of messages to the relevant attendees. Just a quick message asking them to come to the cafeteria. It’s very small guest list, but that’s fine, after all, even she won’t be attending the festivities.

No, that’s a bit too public of a setting for the afterparty, if there’ll be such a thing. So she’ll wait in her room for the time being. It won’t take anyone looking for her too long to find her, though if they want to, well that’s another story entirely.]

Comments

》aki

[nutkick]

[ the invitation was certainly ... random and came out of nowhere considering their limited line of communication with each other. denji is not sure what to expect as makima hasn't specified the reason behind the request, nothing more than asking him to join her in the cafeteria. well, maybe it was time for her to abuse her side of the deal. it took her long enough. denji is now curious about what she would ask of him, and maybe a bit nervous.

what he did not expect was— this.

as soon as he entered the cafeteria his gaze settled on the cake, positioned perfectly in the center of an empty dining table and his heart sank to his stomach almost instantly. time slowed down, distant voices began to muffle and all he could hear was his own rapid heartbeat. he then glanced up at the festive decore; there was something about the empty open space of the cafeteria that made the scenery even more daunting— more lonely. he froze in his spot, just like that day. he didn't say anything, just like that day.

how long was he standing there before aki stepped in is ... unknown. ]

[lifeprice]

Denji.

[ Aki is feeling painfully on edge. This month is a deadly one, a dangerous one, and he's been particularly tight-lipped about his poor attitude and feelings over the last week; he's not mentioned a word to Tsurumaru, though he probably should have. His priority right now is to make sure that Denji is alright, and ignore the burning in his stomach that betrays what's at the forefront of his mind.

He died. He died, and Denji had to - after he went to see Makima - if he goes home, he's going to -

Walking over, without hesitation, Aki reaches out to take the other man's hand, squeezing his fingers and trying to keep himself together. He has to be strong this time. ]

You don't have to stay.

[ He knows.

He understands. ]

[nutkick]

[ he flinched a bit at the touch, and if it wasn't for aki's secure grip, denji would've pulled away. he didn't look at him. he couldn't or maybe didn't want to face him yet because he knew what would happen. they had this conversation plenty of times; there are no more tears to shed, words to express, and confessions to spit out. they have follow the textbook, they promised each other to move on from it, find their happiness and enjoy what little time they have with each other before they part ways again. they've done it all -

then why did it still fucking hurt? hurt this bad. far worse than before. it's like an open wound that never stopped bleeding.

he's quiet for a bit, still staring ahead— staring at no one but the empty space. the decorations were supposed to be in vivid, obnoxious colors, yet under the flickering lights of their kitchen they were dull and gloomy. 'happy birthday' it says. the cake is big enough to feed many people, yet she left behind a single chair; neatly positioned. ]

I'm really ... all alone, huh.

[ no. he's not talking about his life in this city, and aki will be able to tell. this is simply a harsh reminder that someone like him didn't deserve a normal, happy life. ]

[lifeprice]

[ Later, Aki is going to have a conversation with Makima about what is acceptable here, with Denji, and he will not mince his words.

Right now, though... Denji needs him more than anything else, and he moves to stand between the other man and the view of the cake, trying to block it out. ]

You're aren't right now.

[ It's a hollow thing, the joy they've found here, knowing that at any moment they could be pulled away from one another again. That Denji would be alone and Aki would be dead and none of this would matter, because they likely won't remember it. But this is all he can offer Denji right now, even if it isn't enough. ]

I'm here with you, Denji. Focus on that. Not what she wants to do to you.

[nutkick]

[ if only aki knew that confronting the control devil is the last thing denji would want to happen; it is the worst possible outcome, especially on this infamous month. everything about that scenario is the embodiment of his trauma coming to life, fated to be more scarring because they're finally— experiencing the best life both of them ever had. this city is aki's last chance to be happy, and he doesn't want his friend to get dragged into his mess again. if he could clear his head enough to consider the option that aki is the type of fool to act on emotions over logic, he would've reminded him to stay away from her, to keep his part of the deal; his promise to denji months ago.

however, unfortunately — denji was out of it.

he glanced upward, meeting the other's gaze, looking terribly pathetic for falling into her games again. that easy. like nothing had changed. he wished he could shake it off, pretend he would get over it, but—

he's quiet for a bit, keeping it together so far. barely. denji then takes in a breath before he asks. ]

.... can you please take it down? I don't want anyone else to see this ... [ the cake and decorations. ]

[lifeprice]

[ Aki nods his head, quickly and easily. It's a simple thing that he can do for Denji, such an easy thing, but it'll get rid of some of his hurt and suffering; that's enough for him. ]

You don't need to ask me twice.

[ Leaning in, he touches Denji's cheek gently, thumb on his cheekbone, before he nods and steps around him, deliberately turning the other man around so that he's not looking. It's too easy to move around, then, getting rid of the decorations, to lift the cake and take it away and shove it in the kitchen. He even scrapes the icing off; there's no need to waste food, but he doesn't want to highlight the birthday either.

This is a difficult month for them both. It will continue to be difficult, because after September... November isn't too far away. Aki doesn't know how he'll cope then, either.

Coming back to Denji's side, he reaches out to offer his hand. ]

Do you want to go back to your room?

[nutkick]

[ he turned around, kept his gaze focused elsewhere— and allowed aki to handle it, to take care of him, even when he promised himself it would be the other way around. even someone as naive as denji understood why makima did it; it wasn't her acting petty and childish, it was something else. a reminder of the life promised for someone like denji, and she didn't need to bother. really. denji knows. he already knows.

by the time his old friend returned to his side, he had enough time to think of his options here. they can't change how they feel, the damage is already been done. with a hazy mind, he nods. yes, he wanted to leave — not sure his room was the best option, but he wouldn't burden aki more. he's quiet during their walk back, and as they reach the room, denji gives the impression this is how their night will end; in silence and defeat. and while that idea is tempting as fuck, because he's tired, he pulls himself together to say something.

- something new. something different.

with one hand on the grip of his bedroom door, he turns to face aki; nothing about his face says he's okay, way too pale and sickish, but his voice is oddly steady. ]

I don't think ... I ever thanked you. For loving Power and I.

[ they already expressed regret, guilt and remorse— but, never this. in such a hellish night, denji figured it was either now or never. ]

I don't think we understood what love is, as cheesy as that might sound, we really didn't. Now I know it was in the way you took us in, the way you made sure there was food on the table, clean clothes on our beds, and teaching us to be less shitty creatures. You didn't need to do any of that. You genuinely loved us.

I guess what I want you to know is ... we loved you, too.

[lifeprice]

[ Walking with Denji back to his room is an easy enough compromise, even if Aki is already planning what he wants to do in the wake of this. His anger and irritation is a present thing, bubbling under the surface, but there's a powerlessness to him that he can't deal with either. He's simply not strong enough to be able to protect Denji the way he wants to, not without the full power of his contracts and the ability to make more, and the fact remains that there's no way he'd be able to stand up to Makima anyway.

Perhaps there is merit in those other surgeries that LILITH offers.

Pausing by the door, expecting to follow the other man inside, Aki almost walks into him when Denji stops and begins to speak, and it whiplashes his heart with a thousand thorns, but a kind of pain that feels good rather than sour and aching.

How is he meant to not comfort him, hold him, after a moment like this?

Tears in his own eyes, Aki reaches out, wrapping his arms around Denji and holding him, tender and warm and as careful as he can be, as if one squeeze too much might break them both. ]

You don't need to thank me for it.

[ Pressing his face into Denji, he breathes out, almost a sniffle. ]

Before I met you both, all I wanted was revenge and death. I sold everything I had to get it, because I would be able to die freely once the Gun Devil was dealt with, and everyone knew it. It's why I took the Curse Devil, why I took the Future Devil when it was offered. Nothing else mattered to me, until...

[ Until Denji. Until Power. Aki shakes a little with the weight of his own emotion. ]

I hadn't felt happiness since I was a child, but then I met you and her. You reminded me what it felt like to care about someone, to want to see them smile, to share their joy and sadness both. Everything I did, everything I chose to do, was because I wanted your happiness more than anything else in the world.

[ More than his own. More than his life. ]

You are important to me, Denji. I love you, and I love Power, and that will never change.