[OPEN] Catch-all!

[bemist]

WHO: Gebura and YOU
WHAT: Catch-all!
WHERE: Anywhere and everywhere
WHEN: Covering September-December (for the times when neither of us tled, how could we)
WARNINGS: Likely violence, spoilers for Library of Ruina, suicide attempt, will edit if anything else pops up




[ Please just shoot me a quick PM if you'd like a starter, we can work something out! ]

Comments

[siffriend]

[ (You






don't remember.)

Siffrin's hand clenches tightly. Trying to ground himself.

(Weeks? Months? How long, Siffrin. How long ago, Siffrin.) ]

... Um. A... while.

[bemist]

...

[ Her fingers flex lightly, and there's warmth that greets his palm, almost like one would feel holding their hands in front of a fire. It's very brief, flickering, and then it's gone. ]

Okay. Then you've got some time.

[siffriend]

[ It's enough to startle his panicking heart, force a kind of soft reset, and Siffrin glances down at their joined hands before up at Gebura.

... Had that been... ]

It'll pass by quickly.

[ (You have to work harder. To remember them, to not forget.) ]

[bemist]

[ No one can say she doesn't practice. But she won't draw attention to it. ]

A lot of people want to get back. You won't be the only one trying.

[siffriend]

[ (You stomach tumbles.)

... Siffrin'll gently pick up the dagger finally, shuffling out a black pant leg to wipe the blood off on, and returns it to his gloves. ]

Want or have?

[bemist]

Does it matter either way?

[ It would still be aiming to return. Though she has to wonder what the other Librarians would think of it. ]

[siffriend]

[ ... ]

No, guess not.

[ Either way, it's an aim to return. Siffrin closes his eye. ]

Just curious.

[bemist]

...

[ She huffs, very quietly. ]

You want to get back to your family. I... did my part, technically. But I can't leave the Library; my form's tied to it. Even if I went back, I wouldn't be able to reenter the City again.

[ Which is... fine, really. It is what it is. ]

[siffriend]

[ (You do want to see them again.

But you don't want to go back to the tedious grind of the loops, to trial and error, after breathing fresh air once more. The air in Dormont is as still as its name. The House is stuffy with sadness and dust. This place...

...

You're such bad person, Siffrin.) ]

Would you stay if they offered, then?

[bemist]

I don't know. [ Sincerely enough. ]

I haven't really thought about it. I guess I just assumed I'd go back.

[siffriend]

Mm.

[ That's understandable. ]

... I think... it's worth thinking about, at least a little. Since there's a lot you can do here.

[bemist]

... Yeah. I'll give it some thought.

[ Maybe it'll be a moot point, like the way Netzach had vanished, and then returned. But if not, she might as well figure out what comes next. ]

How are you feeling now?

[siffriend]

About what?

[ Or in general... ]

[bemist]

Today. Everything that happened, with this. [ she'd gesture, but one hand is occupied and she's waiting for the other to stop bleeding. ]

You look tired.

[siffriend]

[ (Oh.

...

You guess you feel something like that, maybe, but...) ]

... I don't feel tired when I'm with you. More... content. So, right now, I'm content. Not... as worried, as I was either. About what you would think of me.

[bemist]

[ Content.

Around her? That... isn't really something she's ever heard, and she blinks once, processing it.

Huh. ]

I was usually approached for greedy reasons. Or sometimes just because people would think my reactions were entertaining, which tends to be their reason for approaching me here. If I wait it out enough, if they realize they won't get anything from me, they move on.

That's what I thought about you, at first. That you'd get bored and find kinder people and move on eventually, because there wasn't anything really that I offered.

[siffriend]

[ That's hurtful. But coming from where she had, it... doesn't really surprise Siffrin either. ]

And now?

[bemist]

[ ... ]

I underestimated you. And...

[ She tips her head back, staring up at the sky. Why are words so hard. ]

... I'm glad you didn't move on.

[siffriend]

[ ... Heheh. ]

I couldn't. I'm... glad you didn't, either. You could've refused me at any time, Gebura, and I would have left you alone.

[ Yeah, so.

The secret is just to tell them "no" once and that's that! ]

[bemist]

I never minded you, though. Obviously you know by now if someone's pissing me off, I have no problems telling them.

[ Like. At all. ]

[siffriend]

You were my tour guide for the first week. It really didn't bother you?

[ Just... going up and expecting her to guide? Even if she offered... ]

[bemist]

Not really, no.

[ She shrugs lightly, mindful of the fact that Siffrin's still leaning against her. ]

It wasn't going out of my way, it was just bringing someone with me. And you weren't obnoxious or demanding about it. I was the one who said I'd do it, anyway. Complaining about it would have been stupid of me.

[siffriend]

[ That they are, and not leaving anytime soon. The warmth is nice; a line against their side, a weight in their palm. Invited, offered, and gluttonously they will never refuse. Oh, if they could do more, they would -- but this is enough, has to be enough.

(And even then. This is a lot more than you could ever even think about with your family members, coward. Do you like your fresh start, Siffrin? Already off on a better foot?

...

You relax your grip. If Gebura wants to let go, you should let her have the option.) ]

You should think kinder of yourself, Kali.

[ Siffrin'll say it as often as it takes. She has plenty to offer, even if she doesn't think so. Not everyone comes equipped with second motives. Even if acquaintanceship starts one way, it doesn't mean it can't go another. ]

... After all, even though Elysium likes annoying me a lot... we're friends.

[ (At least, Elysium calls you friend. There's no reason not to believe that. It just means he treats all his friends the way he treats you.) ]

[bemist]

And you should probably be reminded that I've killed a lot of people, Siffrin.

[ Said with a sigh. Again, it's not something a kind individual would do. She'd cared for many of them, after all.

Her hand remains where it is, regardless. ]

Though Elysium is the befriending type in the first place. Annoying or not, you're pretty accepting. I'm not surprised the two of you are friends. [ Callisto throws her more, honestly. ]

[siffriend]

I know. But... you do have a lot to offer, that's all. You should trust that.

[ That's all he means. She always brings that up as a point against her being kind in any way, but doesn't the years she spent protecting others, believing in something better, count for anything? Doesn't her thoughtless thoughtfulness here matter? If Mirabelle can consider Siffrin nice, which they don't understand but accept because Mirabelle said so, then can't Gebura accept this from them?

...

Maybe... Not... ]

It's probably more surprising that Callisto and I get along to you.

[ Haha. Well, mm. He'll send a picture of his invite to her, since he had it on hand from showing Elysium anyway. ]

He's more like this to me. And he accepts when I say no, too. He can be a little pushy, but he doesn't push too far... you and Elysium have different experiences with him, though. So I don't blame you.