TRAVEL LOG #5

[synfluxmods]

TRAVEL LOG #5

CONTENT WARNINGS: death, nightmares, gun violence, survival scenario

▶ 001. EYES WIDE OPEN.

"Angels of Lilith, report for duty in the DISPATCH."

The day starts off with alarms blaring and oculars shining bright lights in the Outsiders' heads, waking them up early for an emergency dispatch. Although the current Rift at Mt. Fuji needs to be explored and examined, the Rifts continue to appear in different parts of the world, and this Rift is no different. Captain Yamakawa continues,

"We have received a distress call from EGYPT. Much of the region fell during the first kaiju crisis. Now it is a desolate land that survives with the help of a generator called an ESSENCE which is currently malfunctioning. We assume the cause is Rift energy—according to our radar, there is a heavy amount of Rift energy coming from that area. We will move out immediately. Pack all the things you may need, but each Outsider will be supplied with a care package of their own containing essentials."

Even though it is 4:00 AM Tokyo time, LILITH hopes you all have slept well. It could be the very last good sleep in awhile. While the dataportal to Egypt is operational on Japan's end, because of the malfunctioning generator, Outsiders are unable to come out on the other side. The old method of using the flying cruiser will be used once again.

There will not be assigned seating for this other than by teams. Everlights will sit with Everlights, Brimstones with Brimstones, and so on. The Outsiders will be encouraged to rest on the flight, and a few hours before landing, an in-flight meal will be provided. The meal is surprisingly delicious and consists of chicken or pork katsu cutlet, but with the warning that all Outsiders will know about: it contains high amount of cyber caffeine. This sort of newly innovative caffeine can keep Outsiders awake for several days, but sometimes it may cause restlessness or hyperactivity, causing characters to have a jittery amount of energy but razor sharp focus. Other times, it simply keeps characters awake and they feel no different. The cutlet will be served with KAIJU™ Energy Drink. Any Outsiders that require a different diet will be provided with what they need, and the cyber caffeine will be added to it if they would like.

Yamakawa gives instructions again:

"We have received more information about the kaiju. Civilians have died in their sleep from horrible nightmares, and we are encouraging Outsiders to sleep together in pairs or groups, or disregard sleeping at all until we obtain more information. We are still receiving facts about this monster, but this meal will help with keeping everyone awake as a safety measure."

Those who do not want to have the highly caffeinated meal can have everyone's favorite: a ration bar that isn't spiked with any energy, but it doesn't taste good at all. Outsiders may be more likely to fall asleep and be in danger by choosing this meal. The balance of a dystopian society.

▶ 002. ARRIVAL IN EGYPT.

When they finally arrive, the air is temperate and dry in Alexandria. The Outsiders might have to check their clocks once more to make sure everything is right; everyone is expected to land in the late afternoon and every clock says it should be close to evening, but the city is already growing dark with the sun setting quite early. Because of the ESSENCE disruption, Alexandria is running on back up energy, which makes for spotty lighting and loss of basic power.

LILITH will be greeted by a small group of researchers at the airport and they will help take the Outsiders to their base: the Alexandria Institute which was once the University of Alexandria. They will give the Outsiders a quick run down of the situation and some background.

1. LILITH does not have a strong defense branch in the region any more. Instead, the branch here seems more focused on research, especially on the origin of kaiju and rifts.
2. This region is extremely prone to spontaneous Rifts. Many of them are small and pass quickly but this most recent one is unprecedented.
3. One evening, in the final week of March, the Alexandria Institute received a corrupt file from their fellow researchers in Greece. It shut down much of their research facility (including their warp portal) and all they have been able to recover so far are the words, "Do Not Go To Sleep."
4. The next morning, they awoke to find the sun rising later and setting earlier. It feels like the days are getting significantly shorter.
5. Many locals developed a fear of the dark and going to sleep. They would then die in their sleep within the next few days.
6. The autopsy of these victims have shown no cause of death, puzzling coroners.

Progress has been slow because the corrupt file shut down many of their facilities. They have not been able to track the source of the Rift or identify the kaiju responsible for it. They believe the answers may be within the corrupt file and will be happy to receive any help they can get from the Outsiders.

When they arrive at the Institute, Outsiders will be set up in the old student dormitories. Each room has 2-4 beds depending on the room, with a common shared area on each floor. Given the current threat, there is also a supply of energy drinks and bars boosted with cyber caffeine. Outsiders have two options:

1. OPTION ONE: Stay in Alexandria and help the researchers with the generators, while keeping themselves and teammates awake during the night by playing games.
2. OPTION TWO: Go out into the Egyptian desert on camel-back, spending time getting to know their camel before heading out.

OOC NOTE: While players may write prompts for both options, we ask that you submit for a clue only once per player (not per character, as we have a lot of characters in game now!)

▶ 003. LEARN & EXPLORE. (ALEXANDRIA RESEARCH.)

Times are hard in Alexandria right now with their generators malfunctioning and efforts being split. The researchers are trying to get the generators back up and uncorrupt the data they received from Greece. LILITH will instruct the Outsiders to help with the research but also warn that they cannot afford to just sit around and wait to crack codes. The researchers also agree. Sometimes the best way to get research data is to go out into the field, but they haven't been able to do it due to not having much protection. The desert is vast, and there have been sightings of other small kaiju lurking beneath the sand and in some smaller cities.

Outsiders can decide to stay in the city of Alexandria to help crack the codes, or they can opt to go out into the field. For the latter, they can choose to stay close to home and investigate within Alexandria.

Those who wish to help with the ESSENCE generators and researchers will stay in Alexandria, using any downtime when not investigating to try and stay awake, slumber-party style. Two Truths and a Lie? Maybe Spin The Bottle? Perhaps some games can keep Outsiders enticed so they don't doze off.

▶ 004. FEELING SANDY (DESERT EXPLORATION.)

For those who wish to explore the desert and smaller cities, Alexandria Institute will supply what they need, such as water, food, essential tools for digging, sleeping bags (no sleeping, but maybe for resting!) and anything else. To conserve energy, the researchers supply camels for the Outsiders to use. The camels are mostly tame, but have their own distinct personalities, so they may need a little more handling and can be coaxed to behave with treats like artificial carrots and bananas. Outsiders can spend time getting to know their camel if they are going to explore the desert or cities. A camel can seat two people on its back comfortably, but also carry any essentials that travelers need to bring along.

In the distant small cities and across the desert, Outsiders will come across Sand Crocodiles, one of the smaller kaiju that have been inhabiting the desert. These monsters are basically crocodiles but with a twist: they can spit fire if angered and they can camouflage in the sand. They hide strategically, and one wrong step will cause them to push their jaws out of the ground, harming a person or camel. The stubby quills along their backs or rounds of their horns aren't entirely covered while hiding, so watch carefully. Fortunately, Outsiders will be supplied with a shotgun. Aiming between the eyes or in the mouth will kill it, but also beating it with the back of the shotgun will also do the trick. And yes, they also taste like crocodile too, if anyone is hungry.

After exploring, Outsiders are requested to report their findings back in Alexandria.

▶ 005. AFTERWORD.

Welcome to our fourth travel log!

Welcome to the new and improved Travel Log! Below, you will see the link to the MONSTER DEBRIEF SHEET post that has information about the kaiju below along with RIFT EFFECTS. Fill out the form for RNG Attacks and whether you would like to receive a RIFT EFFECT. This should give characters some ideas for the status of their character in the next log, which will have more action and monsters in it. Outsiders may use the CHAT to report and discuss any findings.

We thank you in advance for your patience as we try out this new format!

All tags on this log are worth 2 points and will count towards April AC.

EVENT BREAKDOWN/RECAP (CLICK TO EXPAND)

1. EYES WIDE OPEN: Outsiders travel to Egypt after receiving reports of their power generator, ESSENCE, being unstable and malfunctioning, leaving citizens in peril. They are instructed to "stay awake." They are supplied cyberpunk caffeine and told to try not to sleep or stay in pairs to be watchful of any danger.

2. ARRIVING IN EGYPT: Arriving in Alexandria, the Outsiders are confirmed that citizens have been dying in their sleep, with coroners unable to determine the cause. The days are mysteriously getting shorter and people are unable to stay awake.

3. LEARN & EXPLORE: Outsiders are given options to stay in Alexandria to help with the generator or find clues to assist the research team. Between researching, they are asked to continue to stay awake by any means possible. Those who will be exploring the desert and smaller cities for clues are given a camel for transportation. Outsiders are encouraged to get to know their camel before traveling.

4. FEELING SANDY: While looking for any clues out in the desert, Outsiders encounter smaller kaiju known as Sand Crocodiles. They hide in the sand and attack at the opportune time, snapping jaws and spitting fire. Shooting them between the eyes or in the mouth will K.O. them.

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Comments

[nutkick]

[ the room is still. a shared silence stretches between them, between bakugou contemplating over the past and denji's more on the edge over their future, this new threat, what it holds, and more importantly— how to keep bakugou safe? not only from experiencing his biggest traumas again, but not to see the half-devil's as well. that was another kind of distress he didn't need to bring on anyone, especially the boy he loves. in the middle of those thoughts, bakugou shifts a bit — and he could feel the light touch against his stomach. the kind that tries to console itself with some contact, some reassurance. a slow curl into the soft fabric of his shirt follows, vague yet intimate at the same time. denji doesn’t move away. doesn’t question it. just breathes, soft and steady, keeping his eyes on those red hues in a silent tenderness. he didn't expect bakugou to say anything about what they've seen, somewhat predicting he'd skip that part, and they end up discussing a plan moving ahead and how to handle this better in the future — only to be surprised with an honest confession.

as they lay facing each other, denji took it in, almost as if the words cost something to bring out, fragile things held too long in a clenched fist. he thinks over bakugou's words. in a way, he understands that feeling, yet he can't explain it either. ] I think you didn't have enough time to process your feelings. You were thinking more about others over yourself ...

[ the hero mentality is dangerous. bakugou would break himself apart if it meant saving someone else. denji is not sure how he feels about it. it might be admirable on paper- the unrealistic expectations civilizations put on their saviors. however, that's why his boyfriend trains so hard, right? he wants to be strong enough to protect and win. to live. to lead a normal life, the best way he can, while saving others. again, denji is struggling to find this — a good thing. there is an ugly, selfish desire to want him to stay away from such a path, not because he doubts bakugou's strength but because denji had so much loss in his life that he can't help but to see an early grave in his lover's future.

quietly, he reached out, and his fingers brushed bakugou's hair from his forehead, tucking some of it gently behind his ear. his hand lingered there, thumb grazing the smooth line of his jaw, before trailing down to rest at his waist. he then eased their bodies closer before his hand slid up the other's back, palm flattening between his shoulder blades. a subtle yearning in the way his arm wrapped around the young hero, not possessive but protective — as if holding him could keep everything else at bay. with a sigh, his knees bent, drawing bakugou's legs in toward his, until their bodies fit together in perfect harmony. ] And you did save them in the end ...

[blastedass]

[cost something? maybe a little. understanding the silence between them isn't making denji feel any sense of comfort. knowing he needs to trust his boyfriend more to see past those usual barriers bakugou puts up. he saw what he saw, heard his thoughts and the voices around him, the sound of his heart and the drip of his sweat. saying "it's fine" is true, but there's more beneath those two words. more than denji has the right to know. bakugou wants the half-devil to see him as a strong, amazing hero. but also a human.

even if that means admitting some painful weaknesses from time to time. they talked about that before, right?] Aa. Getting emotional in the middle of a battle's only gonna distract you.

[when said battle is during a war for the survival of your entire nation, you don't have the luxury of fear or despair. you go, hard, fast, strong, forward, until there's nothing left to move. the hero mentality. he'll break himself to train, break himself to save, break himself to grow, break himself to win as many times as he has to. is it too much different from denji? how many times has the half-devil splattered himself during a fight, only to consume and revive and stand up for another go. denji himself wants to be a superhero even back in his own world, without knowing who the hell bakugou was. but their ideas of heroes clashed when they first met. he hopes, when they all go back home, the part of him that stays with denji contains some of that heroic ideal.

he can't fault his boyfriend for those selfish thoughts. parents don't want their kids facing danger. heroes don't want their interns to risk their lives. lovers don't want the person holding their hearts to vanish in a blaze. denji's already lost so much in his life and bakugou doesn't ever want to become one of those painful memories, left behind in darkness and blood. he has to prove to him each time that he'll come back. that he has a reason to live, and his name is denji.

he shifts his arm, curving at the elbow as the back of his knuckles skim across the other boy's shirt-covered chest. from abdominal muscles to diaphragm curve to strong pectorals and a dangling cord on his sternum, all the way up to his mouth, where he can gently brush his index finger's side over his boyfriend's lips. as denji draws him closer, he lets the half-devil pull him, moving until they're once more touching in a gentle flush. a hand settles on his back between his wingbones and bakugou turns onto his side, hooking a leg over and around the back of one of his lover's. holding on to guard and protect.] It wasn't just me. I didn't... I couldn't... have done it on my own. Everyone else did their part.

[the one victory bakugou will eternally refuse to take full credit on.]

[nutkick]

[ jokes on bakugou, there is nothing he can do to come off as weak in denji's eyes. if only the hero knew the type of strength that he'd seen in him from day one, and it had little to do with his quirk and winning records. it's his unapologetic confidence. katsuki stays true to himself no matter what, and even if he's dealing with a tough situation that does leave its scars in his heart, his next step would always be 'how can i do better next time?'. his spirit is too strong, too attractive, too appealing, and denji couldn't help but to be admired by his shine. he had never been jealous or intimidated with the gap between them, the broad diversity from someone who had high ideals, high standards and demands to be treated in the way he fucking deserves — and there is denji who'd been living in the streets, used and abused, covered in gore and a broken soul. even when they stand by each other's sides, with the half-devil treated as equal, it's hard to deny the reality. they both try to save, but in two extremely diverse ideologies. denji is drifting further and further from what’s right, slipping into something colder, something less human. but that’s exactly where bakugou’s strength becomes his anchor.

just being near him is grounding. watching his boyfriend stand proud to his ideals, even when everything seems hopeless ... is powerful. he doesn’t waver. he puts the safety of others before himself, tirelessly tending to civilians, working with the medical herbs to heal the outsiders. his determination doesn't just inspire— it reminds denji there is hope in this life. maybe if the world had more heroes, it wouldn't be as grim and hopeless. wouldn't it be cool if he was the inspiration? ah, it's a lovely thought. it brings a smile, even when it is unlikely to be his fate back home. a guy can dream, right? ]

True ... but I bet you gave him hell. [ with a tired smile, denji attempts to lighten the mood. the more they speak, the more reassured he feels that his boyfriend will be fine. the fact he's talking about it, tone clear and guard down, denji knew the trauma of that day has no hold on the other— otherwise, he would still run away with it, bury it down, and suppress it. a part of him wanted to listen to him more, tempted to ask him about izuku, but he didn't want to push his lover too far. instead, he stays silent, eyes attentive, even behind low lashes and heavy bags. a quiet, focused stare that silently promised him he would listen to anything and everything. at his own pace, no pressure.

and then - a single fingertip brushed over the curve of his mouth, light in its touch. the simple gesture pulled something loose in him, pulled deeper into the calm they created just by being there. denji nestled in, resting more of his weight on their shared pillow. Then, almost instinctively, he leaned in and placed a soft kiss on the side of his finger. he started to, slowly, caress bakugou's back, blindly following the curve and somewhat tugging on the drenched fabric of his shirt so it wouldn't stick to his skin too much; trying to make his boyfriend more comfortable. ] I'm sorry for not believing you at first. When you said you're fine ...

[blastedass]

[he doesn't deny the reality. there's no escaping it. growing up in a fancy house, blessed with a powerful quirk so early, born with an amazing body and mind, with so many opportunities... compared to a dirty urchin in the streets with a debt on his head and living one day at a time with sold body parts and a weak constitution. no, bakugou's never thought their backgrounds were equal. it's their presents he tries to balance out. as denji stands beside him, he focuses on what he sees inside the other boy. no matter the scars and traumas and issues, a good heart with a kind personality and a simple desire for his happy life. who the hell can say such a thing is wrong? katsuki wants to respond to that desire as best he can, because he loves seeing denji smile. they're different, he knows this, and has zero intent on changing the other boy to fit into some mold. guiding him, encouraging him, giving him the options and models he never had in his life, so denji's able to choose for himself later. he still can't bring himself to order his boyfriend to live one way or another. but he can reach out to him and take his hand, both to support him with his presence and to pull him forward into a brighter future. he won't see the man he loves become a devil without a fight.]

Damn right I did. That bastard went out with a boom. [he won't take full credit, but he will smug it up about his part in the fight. some of it was skill, some pure fuck luck, and the rest was shit choice and timing on all for one's part. of course he's going to be fine. this isn't the first time he's had a nightmare. rattle his cage, race his heart, pump his adrenaline, it'll all pass as he returns to his life. his trauma will never leave from any of those horrible experiences. he hates tentacles or gloop restraining him or plugging his mouth, he'll always tense up hard if someone grabs his nape without warning, and his scars will ever be indecisive about how they react to physical touch. but he refuses to be controlled by his trauma. they're nothing more than the millions of parts which make up his life! and he'll choose which of those parts he focuses his life on.

at some point, he'll talk more about it in detail. but not now, not when denji's feeling strains of guilt over something he never should be. completely validated in his own feelings and wants, two facets katsuki works on appreciating even more. tracing his lips' shape, smooth lines rimming his mouth, corners soft and cupid's bow present. a simple touch indicating his presence and denji's importance to him. tucked in close, legs tangling once more under the sheets, ah... there it is. the kiss he knew was only moments away from settling on his finger. gentle and warm. only to trade out for the "bleh" feeling of his soaked shirt getting tugged from his back. bakugou pulls a face at that before resting his forehead to his boyfriend's.] Don't apologize. Heroes... don't let "I'm fine" stop them from caring about someone.

[they stick their noses right in that business and make sure for themselves "i'm fine" truly means "i'm fine." denji wants to be a hero back home? that's one element of bakugou's worlds' heroes. he leans in, nips his boyfriend's lower lip.] Now take this damn shirt off. It's fucking soaked. [gross.]

[nutkick]

[ it would be interesting to learn about those little triggers; not that denji had the habit to enjoy restraining the other (unless it's during training, as using the chains is the safest method to win), and he's not fond of manhandling him from the back of his neck, only because it felt disrespectful in a way. it's the kind of thing he'd do to intimidate someone, or out of pure spite— so denji wouldn’t dream of using it on the boy he actually cares about. that said, he has no problem kissing, licking, and biting the hell out of his neck. it’s a deliciously tempting spot— warm, delicate, and fucking sensitive, perfect under his tongue and just as rewarding for the other boy. ever since they started getting intimate, that patch of skin has probably gone only a few rare days without a fresh bruise. he's not sorry about that.

as they settled deeper into the bed, denji felt a flicker of peace. the knot of anxiety in his chest had loosened— just enough for him to be more confident, if only for now, that they could overcome these testing days without any major losses. honestly? he’d come close to suggesting they join forces with other outsiders, driven by a quiet fear of bakugou uncovering more of his pain, the raw, miserable scraps of his past. but maybe ... just maybe, they could avoid repeating the same mistake. they just had to move faster, act before the fear had time to sink its teeth in. no hesitating. no freezing in the face of those intense, shifting visions. the moment any of them notice the world around them twist, he needed to snap the other out of it. punch or slap as hard as they can. ]

Yeah, a hero would never give up. [ and, he would take it, because denji is that type of scum. he could argue his record isn't the best, but nah. they're having a calming moment after dealing with a scary experience. they are allowed to enjoy it, take their little wins, and move at a steady, healthy pace. he's proud of himself, proud of them, proud of .... the book he's been reading? was it the secret to this success? it could be. he shifts his attention back to bakugou now, lips twisting into a perky smile as they snuggled up, forehead to forehead, totally unbothered with the touch of sweaty flesh against his own. he closed his eyes, taking it in, even when he can hear the soft grunt under his lover's breath, very aware he's getting a bit antsy with the aftermath of their distress.

yeah, it's not ideal. they both need a change of clothes, spread some fresh sheets, and toss the old ones. they might need to shower, too. however, that would involve a long trip to the cleaning space, with plenty of formalities and unwelcome small talk along the way — he's not in the mood for any of that. the half-devil just wants to be unproductive and clingy, wait until his boyfriend is calm enough to take over the next shift, and watch him rest for a bit. he heard that request, totally did, even when his response might suggest otherwise. anything post " - Now take this damn shirt off." will be muffled against their kiss, breath warm, and their lips squished together. is he shutting bakugou up just to avoid the work of peeling off that soaked, stubborn fabric himself? - yup. ]

[blastedass]

[training is a completely valid use for chains and bakugou's encouraged denji to use them when they spar. he won't get any triggers from getting strung up by chainsaw man in a fight since his adrenaline's going and he trusts denji implicitly. it's other more nefarious sorts of bindings (see the sloppy tentacle kinds) that run the risk of triggering anything. similarly, while they're making out or fucking or otherwise enjoying close proximity, where bakugou's expecting touches, a hand sliding around his nape or brushing over the area isn't gonna set him off since he knows it's gonna happen at some point, already soaking into denji's touch and wanting him to do so everywhere. hold him to pull him in closer, not some damn grab like a kitten's neck scruff. besides, he's been the recipient of so many bites, sucks, kisses, licks, and other oral manhandling on his neck already. thanks, babe. even bit him there like a fucking dog while mounting him the same way. yeah, bakugou blew his load all over the sheets because of it. shut up. denji's sexy.]

Aa. [cowardice, giving up, loss, things bakugou refuses to accept from anyone calling themself a hero. heroes win. he's always believed that, since why the hell would you fight or do something if you didn't plan to succeed? who walks into a challenge planning to fail? and why would you bother wasting the resources to do so. bakugou understands denji's past is sordid, and he's made some choices the blonde wouldn't agree with. but denji comes from a different world, with different experiences and circumstances; it'd be fucking unfair to levy his own world's morals and expectations at him without warning. like other people, bakugou focuses on how they act here in this world, alongside him. he'll judge and decide from there.

bleh, it's hot again. even in the cold dessert nights, even with the damn barred window sitting up there letting in the air, bakugou still feels hot. the stupid nightmare, and a much better source being denji's warm body pressing against his own as they tangle together under the sheets. him and his perky little smile which sees the blonde leaning in to bite at it, petulant. normally he's not bothered by sweat, but that's outside and active! not when he's sleeping in his bed trying to be comfortable! sex notwithstanding, though even then, provided he's not fucked into flickering consciousness, he wants to shower and change the sheets rather than sleeping and waking in their own mess of sweat, spit, and cum.

mph! and now he's show up with a pair of lips against his own. ugh, this damn brat and his clingy love. bakugou wraps an arm around denji's shoulders, pulling him in close as he returns the kiss. fine, if denji doesn't wanna enjoy stripping him (yes, he's gonna taunt him for that) then the blonde's gonna do it for him. free hand not clutching at his boyfriend dives down and grabs for his hemline. with a quick yank upward, he starts wriggling himself out of the soaking material, finally shucking it over his head and then dragging upward to strip it off his arms above his hair. it breaks the kiss momentarily, but he reclaims it even as he bares himself and throws the material away.]

[nutkick]

[ a different world, with different experiences and circumstances — and a different understanding of what a hero is. bakugou reflects an image that is inspiring, and as much as denji didn't want to admit it, it's also so far out of reach. the kind of hero you read about, capes in comics, shining swords, right and wrong divided by a blade’s edge, clean and gleaming. in his world, denji only remembers a different edge; one that is rusted and slick with blood. the concept of a hero in his world is shaped by necessity, not glory. a title bound with selfish desires, not applause. he still believes pochita is a badass superhero, but he also knew that bakugou will never share that sentiment. in the end, being in this city — he had a chance to be more like dynamight, learn and follow his path, and he's hoping he will never be put in a position where he is forced to break that image.

ah, is it that warm?! denj is still oblivious of how his body temperature is less favorable during the warm weather, ironically blaming bakugou to be the type to sweat easily due to his quirk. not that learning about this disadvantage will change anything! if he wants to cuddle, he will make sure of it. he might attempt to make it more tolerable by switching on the air conditioner or doing whatever is required to stop any complaints coming from his boyfriend. when they return home, or hopefully back to their old base, he will have to think of a way to make his bed more suited for the hot summer nights. a lighter blanket, softer bedsheets ... keep the room cool, freezing, so bakugou has no choice but to seek refuge between his loving arms. he trusts himself to come up with a super bright plan when the time is right, when he's not so distracted. ]

Hey! You thief! [ even as they returned to kissing, the half-devil didn't waste the brief opportunity when the other boy pulled the shirt over his head to express annoyance. who allowed bakugou to do the stripping? he feels cheated, as if someone robbed away the piece of treat he'd been thinking about all day, taken without any permission or right. just because he was too lazy to do it doesn't mean he wasn't going to! ngh, it's hard to stay mad when the lack of fabric is hitting all the right spots, chest to chest, bodies pressed with his hand holding into the bare skin of his waist. a low, invisible heat crawled along his skin, pooling behind his cheeks; sweat beaded at his temple, uncertain whether he was finally feeling the heat or if it was triggered by something else.

he deepened the kiss, moaning softly into it and becoming a bit frisky. his fingers then slid up his lover's abdomen with an intent to feel him up more, grope and fondle his favorite spot as always, and — that’s when he felt it. the rough texture across flesh that used to be smooth, now mapped with a haunting memory that is too fresh in his conscience. scars, healed and no longer bruised, but not hidden. it's not his first time touching them, but this time he ... froze. a flinch, his fingers pulling away from it in a manner that surprised denji more than anything else. his shoulders tensed. shit, he had to remind himself that bakugou is okay. his arm is better, his body doesn't ache as badly anymore. it's fine ... he's fine. ]

[blastedass]

[of course it's warm! he woke up from a fucking nightmare sweat a few minutes ago! whoever said fear's a cold sweat is a fucking moron. denji being his usual hot self-- both ways --doesn't help matters either. what the hell kind of difference is his shirt being on or off gonna make? for one, he won't have a sticky wet layer coating him and getting uncomfortable when it starts to cool off. for two, he's never had an issue sleeping with less clothes on around denji once they started getting intimate. and he's not forgotten how much the other boy likes physical contact. luckily for them, the base back home is well air conditioned, so those warm summer nights are comfortable regardless. minus after a heavy fuck leaving them dripping, boiling messes all over a bed stained with sweat and cum in several damp spots. a change of sheets or change of room happens afterwards. but right now, with the desert outside and the lack of ac inside, it's gonna get cool very quickly as the heat wears off.]

Urusei. It's night. [don't whine at him about stealing a kiss when you're the one kissing him already! he told denji to take his shirt off before, only to get nothing for it! so damn if he doesn't take matters into his own hands and strip it clean over his head. with his body soaking in sweat like this and his shirt a plastered mess, bakugo's patience vanished the moment his mind was clear enough to focus on his discomfort. shoulder flexes, elbow unfurls, and he slaps his arm aside with all the care of a bored stripper after a million times. relief. no longer sweltering as he flops onto his back upon the bed, eyes half-lidded and now-bared chest shifting with his breaths amid gleaming sweaty skin. denji's hands remain locked around his waist, holding on and touching in places promising to steal his breath with a bit more pressure.

bakugo leans into the kiss, tilts his head as tongue and lips push and part respectively for an invasion of denji's mouth. another moan vibrates into his jaws, abs hardening as fingers slide over the chiseled sculpture of his stomach muscles. damn, he knew this was gonna happen. compared to that shitty nightmare flooding his brain with images of his death and sharing a haunting video of his demise with denji... he likes this a lot better. distraction, physical reminder, i'm here. i'm alive. bakugo's breath hitches in his throat, pectorals tightening as fingers skim over his scar, a wound his boyfriend's seen first hand bloom on his body. of course he freezes, caught up in reality, and bakugo reaches one hand out to snarl in scruff sandy blonde hair. drawing him up until he's looking into his boyfriend's eyes.] Don't stop. You haven't in the past.

[nutkick]

[ yes, it's night time. the nude hour. the perfect excuse to get rid of the burden of covering their bodies with fabric because society told them so, yet it doesn't justify bakugou breaking the law by undressing himself. isn't this the number one boyfriend rule? you're not allowed to take off your clothes anymore and must wait for your partner to do it for you? especially when they're in bed and being frisky. denji will have to address this major complaint in a serious discussion tomorrow or later in the night. when he's not trying to get the other boy's attention on him, as he yearns to seek an escape from the thoughts circling his head. it's strange how denji understood that pattern yet didn't know how to stop it. it probably would've been easier to mute it out if the memory of it wasn't so fresh. he can almost taste the air burning, thick with smoke and adrenaline, as if the world itself held its breath between explosions — each blast syncing with the erratic, thunderous rhythm of bakugou’s heart. it's the kind of nightmare that follows you to your wake, and denji wanted nothing more than to shake it off.

fuck, bakugou noticed that little flinch. it was stupid of the half-devil to assume otherwise, given how attentive his boyfriend is and all. his lashes lower as he gets yanked from the hair, meeting those fiery red hues as if he knew what would happen next. despite his inner frustrations with himself, despite knowing he probably won't be able to get rid of horrid visuals, and acknowledging he might need to put some effort into feeling comfortable again with touching those scars, it didn't stop his hormones from reminding him he's still a young man. still starved for physical reassurance, no matter what the circumstances are. ugh, no more overthinking. it's the worst neverending cycle that breeds nothing but shitty feelings. voice it out. be vocal ... he'd rather hear bakugou's voice over those mimics in his head. ]

I'm having the most confused half-boner right now ... [ he scoffed, lips relaxing into a smile, not sorry for saying it this way.] I'm still not over what I've seen, but ... you're too attractive. You're making it hard not to touch you. [ as much as he wanted to show off to his boyfriend that he could get over it, denji couldn't bring himself to brush his fingers over those scars again, knowing he'd end up cowering away. instead, he aims lower, tracing over the loose hem of bakugou's pants, feeling up his bare hip under the fabric. a touch that was more confident and at ease, leaning more into a loving gesture than a lewd one. in denji's book, it's still somewhat innocent even when he had his hand between his lover's thighs while taking his lower lip between those sharp teeth of his. ] Hey ... so ... wanna get on top? [ okay. maybe it wasn't so innocent after all. ]

[blastedass]

[oy! he told him to! denji didn't do it fast enough, bakugo's impatient and hot, so he handled it himself. as he's going to handle the remnants of his nightmare, his memories, now clinging to denji's mind like vicious lampreys lurking in his skull's shadow. a fucking kaiju saw fit to strip him of something personal and invade his boyfriend's head without his permission. whenever they find this shitty thing, he's going to rip it apart personally! but right now, thoughts of kaiju and battle are launched from his mental window, replaced with a far more pleasurable sight of his boyfriend's pinking face, widened eyes, and hanging jaws, lips barely underscoring each point of his pretty sharp whites. maybe it's a bad idea to get frisky while they're in the desert, but beneath its moon and with its heat evaporated from the grains, what crawls over the sand and dunes is a far more frigid atmosphere, perfect for heating up.

of course noticed! their faces are less than a foot from each other, his skin's sensitive enough around his scar to tell if something stops moving along its perimeter, and he's been with denji for over a year now; he knows how his boyfriend can get when guilt or sorrow clings to his current state. worried for bakugo's safety, wondering if it hurts, questioning if a touch between them on this area will bring back bad memories. fingers buried in denji's hair, curled warm and firmly on his scalp as he hauls him forward into his personal space, he refuse to let his partner go until he chases these shitty worries out of his head and reaffirms a very clear, brazen fact: i'm alive. denji won't ever purge those memories unless he goes home and they're wiped. he has to live with them now, a burden bakugo's unwillingly placed on him. is it not also now his duty to help his boyfriend carry them? he's had to deal with the half-devil no longer wanting to be close to him with his chainsaws out; this is another version of that.]

You're looking at me like this and it's only a fucking halfie? [good thing bakugo has two hands cause his second one's diving down and roughly groping his man between his thighs. fingers playing with the bulge in his underwear, kneading his balls as the hell of his palm rubs up and down his semi-erect shaft. engaging in sex after a horrific nightmare is kind of stupid on the one hand, but on the other, nothing bleaches a brain like endorphins and bliss. a low husk of pleasure and annoyance ghost across their lips as sharp teeth take his lower lip between them, never failing to hit that weird kink in bakugo's mind. guys with sharp teeth, huh. and his boyfriend has amazing ones. how the fuck is he not gonna be attracted to that? he trade groping denji's dick through his boxer briefs for actively pushing said material down his thighs, working to strip him as far down as his hands can reach.] I was planning on it. Roll over.

[nutkick]

[ the thought that old wounds might still ache, that a simple touch could bring back something awful, haunted him more than he liked to admit. he wished he could be better about it. he didn't want to give his boyfriend any reason to think it would’ve been easier if he’d just kept the darkest parts of himself hidden. denji understood that bakugou's retort came from love, not wishing to burden him with his past, but still— he didn’t want to seem fragile around him, like someone too damaged to handle the truth. trauma or not, denji is someone who could hold himself together when it mattered, he would always stand up and fight back, even when it still hurts. and when his fear or pain did break through, it came in short, sharp bursts— intense, yes, but brief. a way of purging it from his system so he could keep moving forward; one might say they're buried and unresolved, and while that is the case in many occasions, he wouldn't handle this incident like old habits. if he's not ready to touch those scars, he won't force it. he will, however, not cower away from the other boy. this time it will be different.

he’s alive. he's safe. and now, it’s denji’s turn to be the steady one, to offer quiet reassurance in the stillness of his gaze, a silent vow that he will be okay, too. he wants to be close to him. he wants to feel the warmth of bakugou’s skin against his, to hold him like a promise, to embrace every part of him. step by step, they will overcome this. unlike the incident with his chainsaws, the half-devil is coping a bit better; quite eager to push through and chase after desires. the hero is right about one thing, though: it is stupid to engage in sex after what they've dealt with. ah, if no one is objecting to it, and both of them are willing, there is no reason to stop it. they can deal with the emotional recoil later. ]

Hey! It's been a rough night! [ a halfie is considered a miracle after watching his boyfriend go through such a horrible ordeal!! if he had time to think about it, he shouldn't be getting a damn boner to begin with. good thing his boyfriend has ruined any chance of having a coherent thought with the way he shoved his hand between his legs— which should not be anywhere close to 'rough' manhandling. there was a brief look of terror in denji's face for a hot second, eyes wide open and guard up, but thanks to the unshakable trust between them, he had to remind himself his lover knew the fine line between a painful squeeze and a pleasurable one ... and denji was right. he lids lower over his eyes again, breathing out a soft moan, relaxing his jaw so he could smother their lips together into a heated kiss. without breaking it off, he shifts to the side, resting on his back before lifting his hips just enough so he could get rid of those damn boxers, kicking them off. his hands find bakugou's waist, ready to hoist him up and onto his lap only to realize the hero still had his pants on. ugh. they should sleep naked next time. on happier news- ] Heh ... it's no longer a halfie ♥

[blastedass]

[he told denji about his scars; there'd been no secret as to how and why he received them. both the initial ones on his shoulder and abdomen, then the later ones on his chest and face. but being told how the scars happened versus being in the damn driver's seat at their acquisition are two entirely different scenarios. yet even with his boyfriend being burdened by that past reality, bakugou refuses to believe it's too much for him. he isn't advocating showing all his hard memories to denji or demanding to see the half-devil's worst traumas, but what's done is done. their path is forward. not a pause, no a reverse. he'll trust in denji's strength. and someday, when it comes time to confront the half-devil's trauma or fear, he'll crack his knuckles and address it with the same power and determination he always does.

while he isn't gonna comment on it until hater, bakugou notices denji's handling this revelation better than the previous one at vegas. understandable, since it wasn't the half-devil's chainsaws which made the scars on his body. being the cause of your lover's injuries is far hard to come back from than seeing someone else's handiwork from a time and place impossible to get to. he rests his forehead against denji's, eyes lingering on the topaz gaze looking back at him. who the hell knows which is the better idea here? sex to distract from the pain and shock, or trying to lie down and regain some precious hours of sleep and recharge for the morrow. tch, he knows which one's not gonna risk another shitty nightmare.]

Yeah? I'm gonna make it even rougher. Until all you can think about is how damn good you feel. [hey, he's not the one who started making eyes when he took his shirt off. maybe denji's hardwired that way, reaction physical and unstoppable. a good boyfriend would have tried to quash such a thing. but right now, blanking everything out in a white wave of pleasure sounds a lot better than lying here and trying not to think about what wants to be thought of. for a split second, he freezes when denji reacts like that, suddenly aware this might be a problem. what the hell? he's grabbed his boyfriend by the dick before and it never earned that kind of reaction! ...gonna have to ask about that later, even as he eases his grip and massages him through his boxer briefs. and no, he's not gonna mangle his dick, dammit. bakugou leans into the kiss, pressing a warm, firm touch together as he pushes denji down onto the futon. before he can settle atop him, he shoves his hands down his hips, shucking his boxer briefs along his thighs and over his knees. won't take much more effort to tug them off his ankles. leaving him kneeling completely naked and glistening with sweat over his boyfriend's hips. also now gloriously naked. denji's hands on his hips pull him over until he's hovering on his knees and toes atop the other guy's pelvis. covers thrown to the side and pillows scattered. just them, together, with nothing else between them.] I can feel that. Either shove it in raw or I'll get you soaking first.

[nutkick]

[ he is handling it better, only for the selfish reason that it wasn't his fault to begin with, as guilt plays a major role in all those gross feelings — it didn't mean he's okay with it either. denji knew he had to deal with the grim realization that his boyfriend will continue to lead a dangerous life, and no matter how supportive the people around bakugou are, there will be a day where he will stand alone facing a force too dangerous and too powerful. it's the path he chose for himself, and as much as denji didn't want this kind of life for someone he cares for, he has to admit he can't save him from it, and he won't be there to protect him. if he decided to switch and try to sell the idea of bakugou leaving his dream behind and settling for a mundane life, he knew he might be putting their relationship at risk. who would want to be around someone who didn't support their biggest dream? and even when denji believed that boy is one of the strongest people he had met so far, he knew his words will come off as him having little faith in bakugou's strength— which is something he knew would piss off his boyfriend genuinally. is he okay with witnessing just how far Katsuki will go to protect others? not really. does he want to waste the next few hours dumping all his insecurities on him instead of trying to seek comfort? no. there is a time and place for such a heart-to-heart, and it's not right now. at times, it seems they both had much to say to each other. hell, denji knew he had a lot of hidden secrets, but the big question remains: did they carry any value in their life here? ... probably not. right? ugh, he didn't know.

back to their escape, their getaway, and the freedom to express themselves without shame. with both of them stripped out of their clothes, bare and vulnerable. inside their room, the moonlight poured in through the open window, casting a pale glow over everything it touched, revealing every curve and hollow of bakugou's body. the light outlining his features with a gentle silver line, cheekbones, brows, the edge of his lips ... and the healing wounds, carved into flesh, thick and jagged. he's not sure if he should be disturbed over the mixed emotions between arousal and grief, but it's happening. finally, he meets bakugou's eyes again, hands still holding his lover from the hips, thumbs lightly caressing the skin underneath. ]

It wouldn't hurt? [ this felt more like a tease over an honest question; it could be the tone of his voice or the subtle curve of his lips. they've done it this way many times, bakugou is a real trooper for tolerating it, but he knew it's not supposed to go this way. opting to take a third option, denji brought his index and middle fingers inside his open mouth, licking and soaking them up in a wet mess. ] I mean ... it's been a while. [ bakugou was recovering from serious injuries, too wounded for them to fuck in peace with that busted arm. or maybe the half-devil didn't feel comfortable enough to drag his boyfriend into it in fear of hindering his progress. as he continued speaking, two slick, thick fingers were now pushing into bakugou, slow and firm, all the way to the knuckle, save for the wet thumb tracing the rim clenched around them. so tight. he pulled those fingers out and pushed back in, tilting at the last second to force the stretch, not too gentle, loving the way those muscles closed in on him in retaliation. he bites down on his lower lip, cheeks burning up, fucking tempted to take up the first offer now. ]

[blastedass]

[denji's one to talk, as he runs a similar life back in his own world. battling devils and humans in a weird ass war, with this side looking to keep him and the other looking to kill him. even with the devil's immortality, he's been stopped, captured, imprisoned, and in other ways, had his life put on halt and ruined. bakugou has to accept his boyfriend's life back home isn't going to be any easier than the life of a hero in his own world. and he won't be there to help him. it'll be up to people he doesn't know, but has to trust, to keep the man he loves safe. but denji's chosen this life for himself, and bakugou's not going to discourage him from becoming a hero. even if he's got some... growing to do.

perhaps their secrets and memories don't care as much relevance in their lives here. what will it bring to his relationship with denji if he reveals how he bullied midoriya during his childhood, or what happened when shigaraki kidnapped him? maybe some little "ah" moment as denji realizes he's being included in bakugou's past. learning more about each other is part of a relationship, right? but things you learn about your boyfriend are funny things. favorite foods, little stupid habits, anecdotal stories. not "let me show you how i died" to the face. and yet, that's also part of him. his dreams, his fears, his questions. should he keep them from denji? on the contrary, should he spew out everything he is to him? ... there has to be a balance.

balance they can discuss later when he's not kneeling over his boyfriend's bare hips and grinning down at his flushed face. muscles flex as bakugou leans backwards, his chest rising with a lazy inhale before abs harden in a visible tease as he lets his breath out. scars, definitions, sweat, denji can see it all, and he's able to see everything about his half-devil lover as well. from parted lips to gleaming teeth to blow eyes to a little black cord dangling between his toned chest muscles. reaching back with one hand until he finds his lover's dick. fingers curl and slide along the underside, encouraging his erection up to lie flush against the curve of his ass cheeks and nestle between them for some leisurely rubbing. hurt? yeah, it'll hurt, but he's had a lot worse.]

It'll hurt. [his drippy smirk and lurid grin suggest that's not a bad thing right now.] But I kinda feel like that right now. [he isn't gonna tell denji it'll hurt less than when he bites clean through his skin with those pretty chompers of his. he quirks a brow into his bangs as two fingers vanish into his boyfriend's mind, immediately jealous and irked he's not the one getting to lick and suck all over those two digits. tongue passing between them in a lewd mess of saliva and spit until they're gleaming all over his skin. he continues caressing denji's arousal, fingers sliding down to roll over the soft smooth skin of his sac, balls lifted from his perineum so bakugou can trace his middle finger along the sensitive tract.]

We've done this a lot. [relax, denji. his arm's been healing for almost three months now! if he was still in pain and wrecked, there'd be more serious problems than raw dicking. how many times have they come together now? he tilts his head back, eyes closing as a low groan bleeds from his lips. denji's fingers squirm against his hole before pushing inside, slow and warm as they stretch his rim open and leave his body tightening all over. doesn't even give him time to adjust before he's knuckles deep with two fingers in his ass. his cock twitches, precum oozing down the hard shaft as he leans forward and braces a hand beside his boyfriend's head. looming over him with his lower lip caught between his lips.] Fuck... you always feel so damn good inside me. I never hurts so bad I don't want more of you, Denji.

[nutkick]

[ bakugou could retire from being a hero, choose another career path that didn't involve him throwing hands with criminals, maybe start a family and settle in, or travel to another country for a new experience— but denji didn't have that luxury. he didn't have the freedom to choose, to run away, to decide he didn't want to fight anymore, or even live a normal life. as long as he shares a body with pochita, it's unlikely he would ever find peace. bakugou can argue that's not true, and the half-devil will believe him, but that won't change his reality. which is fine. denji has decided long ago not to burden anyone with it; he will focus on his temporary life here, feed on it, enjoy it, fill his heart with memories that he knew won't return home with him. his story is hopeless, meaningless grief that no one could protect him from, he lost hope in it — with that said, he wants nothing more than to hear everything about bakugou's life, the good and the bad. at times he wanted to force it out of him, frustrated to miss out on so much, yet he didn't know how to say it without coming off as childish. maybe when they slip into their old routine and things calm down, he will talk to him about it. maybe instead of waiting for the right moment, denji should create it ... a thought to consider.

as for his current thoughts, they're nothing more than pleasurable sins. they are corrupted because he's having an intense boner over watching the person he loves flex the same scars that almost killed him. he just watched it happen, he could feel bakugou's agony, he could see all the blood loss, the screams of his fellow teammates and teachers— he'd seen it all a few fucking minutes ago. just a few minutes ago! and now all he ever wants to do is pin the other boy down and smother his tongue all over the rough texture of those marks, starved for a taste. how can he even explain this to anyone without getting judged over it? impossible. it didn't even end there, bakugou had to push him further to the edge as he started fondling with his cock, teasing him with his fingers and pressing down on him; muting the tiny voice of reason that waved the red flag in a warning.

it will hurt, he says, and it was music to his ears. a third fingertip pushed at his rim, but there was resistance that denji didn't try to force, just kept fucking the other with his two fingers. ] Damn ... I kinda feel like a weakling for making you prep me so much during my first time. [ his smirk widens a bit. and now, with every thrust, that third finger tested him, tested if he could try to squeeze inside until at last, it did, up to the first knuckle, where it and the other two fingers stopped. it was insanely tight that denji knew if he acted stupid, it wouldn't be the 'good' type of pain. with that, he slowed down, face heating up, watching bakugou dominate his view, feeling himself sinking lower into the thin mattress, heart pounding inside his chest. still going in slow, but it failed to translate to gentle, he wiggles the third one deeper. he tilted his head forward ever so slightly as his jaw unhinged farther; the saliva glistened along his teeth, thin strands trailing and snapping as his mouth widened like a predator preparing to devour. he didn't reach for bakugou's lip, instead he brushed his tongue along his open throat, feeling his heartbeats pulsing and flooding his senses. denji's eyes fluttered half-closed in bliss. ] Okay, fuck it ... I want you right now.

[blastedass]

[he would challenge that notion. while not a "luxury", denji has the ability to up and leave the city, even nation, he's in; working odd jobs for money (now that he's cleaned up) until he can buy a ticket, or straight up stowing away on a boat or plane. he could likewise retire from being a hero, could stop fighting altogether, find another job or career in a new place where no one knows him (until some asshole crawls out of the wood works), live a "normal" life and ignore criminals or violence with apathy. bakugou doesn't know how intrinsically pochita and denji are bonded, what if any demands the devil made of his human partner in exchange for bringing him back to life, though he's aware humans and devils of all kinds continue to show up and make life crap for denji. by the same token, villains will continue to be villains, and disasters will continue to befall humans.

for someone who's desired to be a hero his entire life since he can remember, the idea of giving up and quitting are similarly impossible choices for bakugou. his job isn't to try and change denji's view or his reality, as much as he'd love to somehow bring his boyfriend peace and make his world leave him the fuck alone. his time here with denji is spent supporting him, caring for him, so when he does go home... he'll remember what it felt like, and continue to live in the face of everything. trusting in his own good heart despite the crap swarming all around him. maybe the memories won't return, but bakugou still believes a small vestige of their lives and feelings here, go back home with them. but they have the time to make those memories here and reinforce all those feelings into whatever-sized crystalization of "us" remains in denji's heart when he returns. talking about their lives is one of those memory-making elements. whenever they get around to it.

luckily for denji, bakugou doesn't want him to explain his attraction or erotic thoughts to anyone else. those are between them, those are his thoughts he's the recipient of, and he's a vicious guard dog who'll protect them from others. if he wants to pin him down and run his tongue over those very symbols of his survival, go for it. took a long time for denji to finally let bakugou touch him with the arm he shredded with his chainsaws, to say nothing of running his hands or tongue over said scars without choking on his own guilty bile. those scars are gone, left in memories alone, and now he has these. which he isn't going to hide from denji or shy away from. they'll be there, every time his shirt comes off, each time they tangle with each other on the blankets and find this heat together. right now, they don't really need tiny voices of reason. passion's a bitch like that.

fuck, he's really gonna tease him with a third one, rubbing at the stretched rim of his hole. he's taken three without a problem before, but every flex of his body thrums with his indecision, wanting to let denji continue fucking him with his fingers, but also really wanting his boyfriend to shove his dick right into his ass and rail him. both digits pump in and out, squelching and slick with noise as bakugou begins moving his hips in a telltale ride. one hand remains swing back, caressing over denji's dick and balls in random strokes. he smirks down at his boyfriend, red eyes glowing under a shadowed veil of choppy ashen bangs.] Don't. I had a lot of fun making you squirm and whine until you were ready for it. [watching denji transition from a nervous "this is gross and weird and hell no" to admitting it didn't feel as strange as he thought to finally twisting on the bed and telling bakugou to stick it in. he hauled a lot of patience into that night, but it was worth it.]

Ah-! Fuck... [third one's in finally, hole stretching around the trio as his dick jumps between his thighs. precum lances on to denji's stomach, his ass cheeks harden from the stab of pain and burn, and he appreciates the pause. until said digit begins pushing deeper, causing him to arch his back and lean away from denji's front. one hand swings behind him and he catches onto his boyfriend's knee, bracing himself with his entire body on full display over the half-devil's figure as he rolls his hips and bucks back against the digits inside him. it's only when he's knuckles deep inside him again that bakugou drops forward again, hovering an inch or so from denji's face as that warm wet mouth opens, saliva stretching between his teeth in lewd beautiful erotic mess. a kiss... no... fuck he's going for his throat, tongue playing across his blood pounding in his veins. the same heartbeat bakugou feels thrumming in denji's ribs currently trapped between the hero's strong legs.] Then pull your damn fingers out and shove your dick in me, babe.

[nutkick]

[ they can have this discussion; they should have it at this point in their relationship, and bakugou will realize just how bad it actually is. sure, denji can work some odd jobs, get enough money to buy a ticket, and start an adventure of self-discovery — on paper, it does sound very doable, right? right. but when a person has been emotionally and mentally abused in the most godawful ways for a long fucking time, they would adopt a nasty habit of internalizing beliefs and thought patterns that make it difficult to see a way out, even when there are options all around. this kind of abuse corrupts a person’s sense of self-worth. it's a slow, insidious process that doesn’t just break down relationships with others but their internal sense of prospect as well. it's a bit hard with denji because he tends not to show it so, hmm, openly? the self-doubt, the self-hatred, the desire to be better, but slowly losing confidence in himself, thanks to his continuous line of failures that came with a high price. one day it will be too heavy, too exhausting, too draining to keep going - and he fucking hopes bakugou would never get to see him reach that point. he will try his best to keep it together and break apart when it's safe.

bakugou might wanna clarify on this one. you know? the whole not sharing the dirty, sadistic thoughts with someone else? because for some fucked up reason denji thinks that's an appropriate conversation to have with an unfortunate soul in the near future. why? because he needs to hear it from a third perspective he's not suddenly developing a kink of watching his boyfriend all fucking mutilated. he thirsts for the reassurance that he's not that psychotic! in theory, having scars is undeniably attractive, often giving someone an air of toughness and masculinity. denji gets that. if bakugou walked into this city with those marks and he had them from day one, he’d probably see them as part of the appeal. but when you consider the circumstances behind this sudden sexual awakening, it’s harder to see it as charming. instead, it feels... well, complicated. ]

Oi, oi. I didn't whine. Don't spread lies ... [ the sheepish grin on denji's face says otherwise, playfully feeling embarrassed about it. yeah, it wasn't easy for him. it required a lot of trust in bakugou and plenty of reflection about his sexuality before he felt comfortable enough to try it. yes, bottoming was the trigger for the half-devil to think about his sexuality and not the months of him exchanging spit and fucking another dude. a fun conversation they could have one day to ruin bakugou's morning. with a tilt of his head, denji was aware that the instinct to sink his teeth into soft flesh was rising with every pulse of blood beneath his lover's hot skin. ugh, is it supposed to be this erotic? it’s the same temptation that lurks in the back of his mind whenever he leaves a few bite marks during their intimacy, always there, creeping under the surface — the delicious desire to chomp and get a nice mouthful in. bakugou hits him with a 'babe', less affectionate and more bratty but he loves it anyway. ] I reeeeally should ... [ denji replies somehow with an open mouth, tongue sticking out, breath hot as he went in for another lick. fuck, his boyfriend is still riling him up, working his coarse fingers around his aching arousal. a moment later, they would hear the slick sounds of denji pulling out his fingers, proud to keep the record of failing to prepare his partner all the way, but since bakugou is so willing, he shouldn't worry. it's fine. leaning away from the other's throat, denji dropped his head back against the pillow and pushed into the other without warning, not stopping until he was completely impaled on the whole of him. he breathed out a low grunt, hands wrapped around bakugou's waist, squeezing hard enough, promising to leave a few bruises behind, he then pulled down as he ground his hips up, like he was trying to force more of himself in. oh fuck. it's insane how tight that boy is after taking in three damn fingers.

it took a few hot seconds to pull his words together, closing his eyes and catching his breath, cheeks heating up. he should give bakugou the chance to adjust, get himself settled over his lap, but nah. instead, he lifted his boyfriend almost off his cock and then dropped him back down as he thrust up, and he'd do it again, then again— each thrust was slow and steady, but firm, just short of hard. he just gotta make sure their neighbors behind the thin walls haven't returned to their room yet before he starts getting too rowdy. that didn't stop him from sweet-talking the handsome boy on top of him, smirking. ] Hey ... would it kill you to call me 'babe' more often?

[blastedass]

[and only just recently they talked about relying more on each other and not hiding away the cracks and stressing fractures of their personal struggles. mah, he can't blame denji for doing what comes to him habitually anymore than he can stop himself from being so self-reliant and not wanting anyone to see him weak or struggling. someday, it'll come to a head. and he'll respond the same way he always has with denji: stick with him.

and he's not gonna rag on denji for finding his scars attractive. there's gonna be a raised eyebrow if his boyfriend sprouts a boner while they're leaning against each other all bloody and gross after a fight, but... actually, something of the sort's happened before. so long as his boyfriend's not actively tearing his arm off or stripping his muscles from his bones while they have sex, he's not gonna say anything. denji isn't up for sex while his chainsaws and helmet head are out anyways. not that bakugo would reject him if he wanted to fuck as chainsaw man. his boyfriend's hot, no matter what form he's in!]

I'm not. [maybe a different kind of whine than complaining with words. bakugo reaches down and finds a little divot at the corner of denji's mouth, nuzzling it with his fingertip. see this? that sheepish look? yeah, totally whined about having a finger in his ass. "feels weird" "why would someone like this" "how long are you gonna" and so forth. half of it was likely denji just getting his head around actually being on the bottom for another guy, despite the amount of times he topped bakugo, and a reality check of someone intending to have sex with him in a genuinely nice and loving way. no threats or deals or force. he'd be lying if he said he didn't have fun that night, watching his boyfriend's pride and sexuality start to crack and crumble in different ways depending on what he did. kissing each other? not a problem. bakugo rimming his ass? now he's squirming. fucking the hero into the bed springs? time and time again. getting his legs lifted in a straddle around bakugo's shoulders? flush-faced semi-protesting city. a lot of waiting for denji to get comfortable before he moved to the next stage. his impatience would've exploded a lot earlier if he wasn't having a heck load of fun teasing his boyfriend through the entire thing.

but more on that later. when he isn't calling denji "babe" and watching the half-devil's face bloom strawberry. shit, where the hell does he get off looking that attractive when he's acting like a brat? tongue slipping between his sharp teeth, a smug tease before it melts into another nip and lick. he rolls his hips, pushing himself back on denji's fingers as the squelch in and out of his hole, his own hand content to lazily stroke up and down the half-devil's throbbing erection.] Ngh-! [fuck, there he goes, fingers dragging out of his hole with a sloppy strand of saliva connecting them. it's gonna hurt, he should've asked for three, but most of the time... bakugo likes the feeling of denji pushing inside him slightly under-prepped. sometimes it's denji's fault for being some damn horny and eager; sometimes it's his. he leans back slightly, pressing his hands to the bed on either side of his boyfriend's head. fuck, he's right there, nudging against his hole. doesn't even have to wait. one good push and-] Ah fuck-

[inside. bakugo tenses up, ass clenching around denji's member with all the force of a lover remembering exactly where his partner likes being touched and squeezed. his head falls to one shoulder, mouth dropping and eyes closing almost all the way. fucking hell, he's hard. burning and stretching him open as he slides in like a knife through butter. doesn't even stop to give him time to adjust, just sinks that big thing all the way inside to the base and leaves him crouched over denji shuddering and panting from the intensity. yeah, it's been a while sine they had sex. bakugo tilts forward, to say something, but hands clamp on his waist and-] FUCK!! [yank him right down onto his hips as the half-devil bucks up. fucking hell, that hurts, but it feels amazing at the same time! his chest and stomach harden instantly, core muscles tightening as his tunnel seizes up around denji's cock. he feels every damn twitch of his shaft inside his ass, each pulse thrumming through his veins and tissue, the way his balls shift as they press flush to his cheeks and perineum. god, why the hell does he always feel so damn good?

bakugo pulls himself up, throwing both arms backwards and grabbing onto denji's thighs hard as he starts thrusting. breathless gasps and moans drag from his mouth almost instantly, head falling towards his shoulders as he rides him. letting denji do the lifting, strong arms hauling him right off his lap into the air, inches of his dick sliding out of his hole until it's just his head left, and promptly dropped or pulled right back down onto him with another firm slap of skin to skin. slow, steady, firm, deep, rocking him and bouncing him as they move together. he tightens his hands on his boyfriend's legs, feet pressing their tops against the mattress to brace himself as he moves. hot ass bastard's keeping a running commentary below him too.] Gonna... promise me... you won't get use to-- .. fucking hell, Denji-!!